The motions of self-criticism and negativity come naturally. It is so much easier to look at yourself and point out each flaw as if it is the defining feature of your body or personality, than to possibly smile and say to your reflection, “You’re perfect the way you are.” In fact, if we dare say we love ourselves, or feel too comfortable in our own skin, then we think we’re crossing the line into arrogance or conceit.
But what is wrong with embracing our entirety and believing it is enough? What is wrong with not striving for the “ideal” image of a woman and instead thinking we already are ideal?
Our bodies and minds have shouldered the weight of comparison and perfectionism for too long, and it’s time we show ourselves we care. We have forgotten the importance of loving ourselves just for being healthy and alive.
The art of self-love is not secret or profound. The items on the following list are not foreign and are, in fact, familiar; they consist of a handful of all the words and actions we would say or do in a heartbeat for someone we love.
However, this time, it’s for ourselves.
1. Buy yourself flowers.
2. Treat yourself to a nice dinner—for one.
3. Wake up each morning and think of three things you are grateful for in your life, and do the same before you go to bed.
4. Take an hour each day to unplug from technology and simply be present.
5. Dress up on a weekday, just because you want to.
6. Speak kindly to yourself—you’re listening. This means ease the criticism.
7. Do all things with the goal of being happy. Do not exercise to be skinny, work to be rich, or dress to impress anyone but yourself.
8. Only buy clothes that make you feel good and that you are comfortable in. Beauty is not pain.
9. Compliment yourself at least once a day.
10. Look into the mirror before the start of each day and say “I am beautiful. I am loved. I am enough.”
