Dear reader,
I do not know you, nor do you know me, but I can tell you something that we have in common: we both suffer from something known as a mental disorder. Whether you’re like me, who suffers from anxiety and depression, or you suffer from another disorder, just know that you are not alone.
It can be hard, not knowing if something will trigger you one day or keep you up throughout the night. I understand what it feels like to look around in a classroom and think, “Please don’t call on me to read aloud,” solely because you don’t want to make a fool of yourself, even though nobody will notice if you mess up. I know what it’s like to walk in a crowded place thinking to yourself, “Why is everyone staring at me?” and constantly feel judged. But something that you may not know is that you aren’t the only one who feels like this, and it’s OK to know that you’re different, misunderstood even. I get what you mean when you say, “I feel like I’m drowning and nobody is there to save me.” I understand what you feel like when you feel invisible.
A common thought with mental disorders is something along the lines of wanting to be “normal.” But what even is “normal?” What are the limitations to being “normal?" What we fail to realize is that there is no such thing as normal. But there is such a thing as being beautiful, and just like everyone else in this world, you are beautiful. Just because you have something that you feel is a setback doesn’t mean that you are strange or any less of a person. Another thing that we fail to realize is that we may be alone with our thoughts, but at the same time, we also have the power to control what we are thinking. Although it may be hard at times, especially when the darker, scarier thoughts start to surface, we have the power to change them.
For those who don’t know this feeling, it isn’t the easiest thing to understand. Those of us going through it don’t understand why we have these feelings either. It’s OK not to know, but if there is one thing that you should know, it is that we are all different. Despite what happens in our minds, just like you, we are still beautiful. It’s OK to be confused about us, it’s OK to ask questions and try and learn about us and our feelings. But what isn’t OK is making sporadic judgments about us based on the negative things associated with our disorders. We are still people; we have feelings; we just have different things going on within our minds.
We cannot control what we are going through, but we should not be shamed for it. We are still people; we just want to feel accepted. We wish it could be sticks and stones, black and white, but it isn’t. Just like everyone else, we experience pain and weakness. Ours is just more of a mental pain and weakness, rather than a physical one. But trust me when I say that I’m where you are, and we aren’t alone. We aren’t invisible. There is so much more to life than what we feel, and one day, we will be able to see our differences as something that we can embrace instead of something we would rather have be invisible.
Sincerely,
Someone who understands
