To the friend who wasn’t really my friend,

Throughout my life, I have been involved in a multitude of sports, clubs, and different classes. Along the way, I spent a lot of time with a lot of people. These were people who I thought had become good friends. They were the people who I would gravitate to during the sport, club meeting, or school day, the ones who I would tell all my personal thoughts to, and the ones who had cute nicknames or emojis in my phone. We had more inside jokes and stories to tell than you can count on our four hands. You were one of the people I loved more than anything, but I guess our friendship was conditional.

After finishing whatever activity we had met through, I found that the one thing binding you to me was one common interest- getting through that same activity as easily and happy as possible. Looking back I realize that each conversation, be it by text, snapchat, or in person, while I tried to get to know you, you were stuck on the one subject of how we knew each other. If you were a teammate, I can see now how all we did was complain about this practice or that other teammate. If you were a classmate, I realize that I was being used. You formed a friendship with me just for homework and someone to talk to in the class that you did not have with any of your real friends. I saw how long talks and jokes became empty conversations and quick hellos in passing, and how those quick hellos became unanswered messages and being ignored in the hallway.

After these realizations, hard and in some cases painfully sad, I want to thank you. Thank you for being my companion throughout all those painful practices, long meetings, and excruciating classes. Thank you for teaching me what it feels like to be used. Because of you, I know not to open myself and my help to just anybody who asks for it. Thank you for showing me who my real friends are, and helping me see how great they are. Thank you for teaching me the difference between friend and acquaintance. Learning that some people are only in your life on certain conditions not only taught me the value of true friendship, but the difference between someone being friendly and someone being civil.

Sincerely,