Those who could have destroyed me were clearly unable to do so. I am still standing despite everything. I am proud of who I am and who I have become and I will continue pushing through every day. I supposed that it is true that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I am certainly living proof.
To The Boy I Thought I Loved:
My attraction to you was like the attraction a drug addict has to heroin: addicting and nearly impossible to overcome. There was nothing healthy about what I felt for you. Everyone saw it but me, and I was to waste years pining for you, my drug. It took my recognition of what love truly feels like to realize how unhealthy this “love” truly was. But you, you took advantage of my addiction every step of the way. You manipulated me the way drug dealers manipulate drug addicts. It’s almost like you knew how addicted I was to you and used it against me. Seeing it clearly now, I long for my innocence that I handed you so eagerly. I can never get that back. However, what I can take from that relationship is knowledge of how love should feel, and that is not it. I was never in love with you, and certainly never will be.
To My Former Best Friend:
We were friends for years. I thought, honestly, that we always would be. But you threw it all away because you took the side of someone who crushed me. You couldn’t see the crushing hurt I was going through. You couldn’t see the pain I was in. When you let me walk away, you ended a friendship of nearly ten years. That meant nothing to you. I have been there for you without a second thought for years on end and you could not do the same for me after what was done to me. Instead you blamed me for what occurred and you were angry with me. The pain is there and the damage is done. I will miss you, so, so much.
To The Boy Who Took Advantage Of Me:
I will never refer to you as a man despite you being older than me because you will always be a child. You were quite obviously attracted to me from the beginning of the night and I won’t say that I was not into you. You are a child because you waited for me to be tipsy before you even asked me what my name was. You are a child because you waited for me to get drunk before you made conversation. You are a child because you waited for me to be unresponsive and then had sex with me. You are a child because due to your actions I lost one of my best friends. I will forgive you so that I may heal. I will never forget.
