Note: These are my personal experiences and observations. It is just as wrong when women act in a similar manner. For example, "He didn't respond to my flirting with him, so he must be gay."
Dear “Nice Guy,”
Are you really who you say you are? You are the guy that was always the friend, never the boyfriend. She loves you “like a brother.” You watch your female friends suffer through heartache, being her shoulder to cry on every time she is hurt by another one of those “jerks” that girls always date. They always go for the “bad boys.” Bitchy. Shallow. Stuck up girls. (I have heard all three of these for politely turning down dates). Girls only care about looks and status, yet you complain that you can’t get a chance with “the pretty girls.” You are the white knight. The “nice guy.” The true gentleman. Girls never see your potential. They won’t date you. You deserve it all. The only exclamation can be that you are “too nice.” As the saying goes, nice guys always finish last. Real ones don't by the way.
Maybe being the “nice guy” isn’t the problem. Maybe the problem is that you aren’t at all. You see, you are not entitled to a “chance” for ANY reason. Women owe you nothing. A date? No. A chance? No. Sex? Definitely not. A “no” is a “no” not a “yes” that has yet to be coerced. Being rejected once and asking again later? That is harmless and maybe you are a “nice guy.” Respect her boundaries, though. Threatening her, calling her names, not stopping, etc.? It is time to rethink that self-imposed label. You are not entitled to anything and especially not anyone.
You see, all women are different. Go figure. We date the people we do for certain reasons. Everyone has unique standards and qualities they look for in a partner, and you may not fit into this category. It is okay to be selective. Although most women do appreciate a man who is truly “nice” this doesn’t necessarily equate to compatible in terms of dating/relationships/sexual interests. Plus, you are not the only “nice guy” out there. I know plenty of nice guys and there is so much more that goes into the equation.
Even if you are truly a “nice guy,” you will realize life isn’t always fair. Even if you feel a woman is perfect for you, she may not reciprocate the feeling. It sucks, but that is life. Everyone has been there and that’s okay. It is how you react that truly measures if you are a “nice guy.” Do you act on bitterness or are you accepting even if it hurts? Do you respect women and their choices? A true gentleman always respects women and their choices.
