Throughout my 20 years of life, I have spent the past 15 years not understanding why you didn’t want me. I don’t understand how someone could just look at their daughter and decide that they didn’t want to be a father. But as this became tougher for me to understand, I decided that is no longer worth my pain. It is pointless to be hurt and upset over something that is never going to change. You are truly a toxic person and you are poisoning my life.

Growing up and coming to visit you during the summers was something that I looked forward to every year but was let down every single time. You made it seem as if we were going to do all of these fun things throughout the summer but you pawned us off to the neighbors or our stepmom. Our stepmom did an awesome job with spending time with us in the summers. Even after she had just gotten done working a very long shift, she was the one who was there for us in the summers while our dad got drunk at the bar. She watched my first swimming competition while you were ordering another ‘cold one.’ She and my brother are who made those summers worth it, not you. To be quite honest, most of the memories from those summers have more of her in it than you.

I have tried anything and everything to build a relationship with you, but the truth is, I’m done. Underappreciated is an understatement for everything I have done for you, due to the fact you have never appreciated one ounce of my love. I was the one who drove four hours to be at your bedside when you were sick in the hospital. I bought you new clothes since you were going to be in the hospital for an extended period, and I didn’t even get a “Thank You.”

I lived with you for four months because I was promised to be given a life that you were involved in; I was fooled. You made it seem as if you wanted a relationship with me. You made it seem as if you wanted to start over and to give me the father-daughter relationship I never had, when really you were just laughing in the background. Our “relationship” is just a joke to you.

Anytime I hear from you it is always to rub something in my face. You don’t ask “How have you been?” or “What have you been up to?”. It is immediately all about you and what you are doing. You brag about my other sibling’s success like you were even a part of where they are today. It is actually disgusting that you could take that feeling of being an accomplished parent from mine and my siblings’ mothers. Those two ladies have worked harder than you have ever worked in your entire life to ensure that we had everything we needed. They worked hard to ensure that we did well in school, stayed on the right track and provided for us (including you). So here is something for you to keep in mind, stop taking credit for other people’s work and accomplishments just because you don’t have your own to take credit for.

You have done nothing but put me down throughout my entire life, and I am done. I remember when you used to brag about the great things I was doing with life, you had no right. You were not apart of those great things. You loved to brag so people would see you with an image of a great father, I haven’t had a single drop of help from you.

To the family I have that is blinded by your actions, I hope one day they see the truth about you just like I have. You have always made it everyone else’s fault, and it is time you own up to your mistakes (that’s doubtful, though). You may fool the people around you, but you are done fooling me. I am done being criticized as the daughter who doesn’t care, because I did for a long time and I am done dealing with the hurt. I am tired of hearing that I have never done anything for you because that is a lie. I loved you when you didn’t love me. I made an effort when you didn’t. I did everything I could to build a relationship with you, but you refused to try.

So to the father that has never been around, you can sit there and brag about my accomplishments that you were not apart of, talk bad about me for no reason, and maybe not even acknowledge that I exist, but you are done hurting me, and I am done with you.

Sincerely,

The Daughter Who Is Moving Forward