Dear Life Ruiners,
Why are you the way that you are? Nobody cares that you finished the movie or show already. We know you’re excited and want nothing more than to discuss in great detail what you watched. Believe me, those who have yet to catch up want to talk about it with you, we really do! We’re just running a little behind. Maybe we’re at work or school and haven’t found time to catch up. Maybe we’re focusing on a different show or movie first. No matter the reasoning, we will finish it as soon as we can and contact you immediately to converse about it. PROMISE.
Still, you cannot wait. Something about you makes you feel the need to shout it out. If you’re the kind that doesn’t mean to spoil something but is just forgetful, I guess I can forgive you, but I will know then to stop hanging out with you until I have watched it myself. On the other hand, if you’re the type of person that gets a rise out of spoiling the ending, I loathe you with every fiber of my being. That smug look on your face after you shout it out is almost as worse as actually knowing the surprise ending. In that moment, I contemplate various forms of murder. I also think about all of the other shows and movies you have yet to watch but that I’m caught up with so that I could ruin it for you. Sure, maybe I’m spiteful, but you ruin the ends of movies and shows so obviously you’re way worse than I am. Honestly, what is it about ruining it for someone that excites you? There's also nothing worse than actually sitting there with your friends as you watch something and one person calls out each scene before it happens. Who raised you?
These days, the Internet has made it a lot harder to avoid spoilers. The minute something is released, you feel required to watch it ASAP just because you know it'll be all over Twitter in an hour. Also, live-tweeting? No thank you. I make it a point to avoid social media at all costs when something airs. I've had too many singing competitions and award shows ruined for me because I just had to scroll through my feed. That's when it's partially my fault because I know better. Nevertheless, I would still appreciate it if you kept your spoilers of the Web.
In conclusion, if you want to be a well liked personal, do not spoil things. It's not funny or cute in any way. It's just obnoxious. I'll probably give you the silent treatment for awhile. You deserve it.
Sincerely,
Sane People
