Dear Fellow Travelers,
I hope that you are going somewhere where you can explore and find new adventures or perhaps back home to someone who loves you. I’m sorry if you had to leave someone you love for a long period of time in order to get to wherever this plane is taking you.
I hope that you’re bag did not get lost and that you did not miss your connecting flight hence ending up on this plane. I hope that this experience will be overall pleasant for you but I have a few things that we need to talk about because let’s face it, we’re in this together.
We have to think of our little airplane or maybe very large airplane as our little town for the time being. It’s our own little community and just like you would treat the fellow members of your community, we must treat one another with respect. Let’s work to make this trip as enjoyable as possible for all of us because in case you forgot from three sentences ago; we are in this together. If God forbid something were to happen to this plane, we would be in it together. I’m just saying - we have to think about these things with the way we behave in our little community.
I know you want to have a great plane ride. We can all agree that no one wants to arrive at their destination, potentially having to run to their next plane, with frustration pent up from a difficult flight because of their fellow passengers. So here’s some things we can all keep in mind to make our time in our little community a little better:
1. If you want to put your seat back, ask the person behind you.
Look at their size, if they’re six foot and already cramped - maybe reconsider pushing that seat all the way back. If you can get through the flight pretty satisfied, don't put your seat back. There is nothing more frustrating than not being able to utilize your tray table to get work done on your laptop because the person in front of you didn’t bother to check in and see how you were doing back there. (I reserve the right to knee your chair at random intervals if you put your seat back without asking first). And if you do decide to randomly put your seat back, don’t slam it all back at once because some of us are working here or maybe have a cup of water. Just don’t.
2. If you have a cough or are sneezing consistently through the flight use a tissue or at least your elbow.
We are all stuck in this teeny little community together, let’s keep the germ passing as limited as possible. I know you don’t want me sneezing on you or sending my germs into the air so why not offer me the same courtesy?
3. If someone’s baby is crying, don’t get frustrated.
I am sure they already feel horrible about it and are doing their best to keep the baby as calm as possible but sometimes baby’s just aren’t consolable. Throwing them dirty glances is going to do nothing but increase the hostility in our little community.
4. If your child is older - break the screen time rule for all of us.
There is nothing more annoying than a squealing and bored kid kicking our chair on a plane after a long day. Break out the iPad - the community thanks you.
5. If you aren’t using your TV screen - turn it off.
There’s no reason to have more light and flashing movement than we already have.
6. If you have to use the restroom and need to get out of your row, pay attention to timing.
Did they just announce that snacks would be coming around soon? Go right now, don’t wait until the snacks started - let’s try out common sense here. Also, you are allowed to use the bathroom before you get on the plane so maybe try that first.
7. If you brought outside food on the plane, please make sure it isn’t smelly.
Some people are highly sensitive to smell so nausea on a three-hour plane ride because you really wanted Pad Thai is just not cool. Eat it before. Side note: if you’re going to eat something with nuts, maybe ask your neighbors if they’re allergic to be the best community member possible.
8. Yeah, there’s alcohol on the plane, that doesn’t mean you have to get wasted.
Nobody likes a drunk asshole on a plane, nobody.
9. A carry-on item and a personal item means a carry-on item and a personal item.
It does not mean those plus your four bags from Duty-Free. We all have the same amount of storage in our little community, it’s not fair for you to take up an entire storage unit because you’re shopping got a little out of hand.
10. If you’re a snorer, think before you sleep just for all of our sakes. Please.
11. If you’re a smoker, please don’t smoke right before getting on the plane.
Because no one wants to smell an ashtray for six hours especially if you’re not used to the smell.
12. Couple traveling together?
No one wants to see you make out 30,000 feet in the air, not even the owner of Porn Hub. Save it for the Honeymoon Suite.
13. Be mindful of your stuff and how much space it takes up.
We all know walking through that tiny aisle with all of your stuff isn’t easy but do your best to not knock out a neighbor with your bag on the way to your home for the next few hours.
14. Smile and say hi to your neighbors - what do you have to lose?
Now this is a lot of requests and we've all broken these "rules" before but if we can all do our little part to try to keep these things in mind, traveling will be better for all of us.
Best Wishes,
Your Fellow Traveler
