Looking at me your initial reaction must be that since I’m super friendly that I have a ton of friends. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. Growing up as an only child it has been super hard to connect and relate to people. Everyone had their “group” and I never found that in the traditional sense.

I feel that I tend to distance myself from girls and put up a front of being someone I’m not. Although I am super girly, outgoing, and I'd like to say nice, I have a side to me that is weird,adventurous and spunky.

Having solid friendships and seeing those fade away in my 19 years of life has been extremely hard on me. Trying to pinpoint what exactly went south in these relationships I’ve had has been detrimental to future friendships. I can’t help but think it’s me. Everyone tries consoling me and saying girls are “jealous” &”catty” which may be true, but that can’t always be the case. By reflecting at the failed and faded friendships I’ve made and destroyed, I came to the realization quickly that my parents are truly my best friends.

Unfortunately, I have grown to be a fairly guarded individual when it comes to girls. From past experiences with girls I’ve lost a lot of trust from having rumors spread and being shit talked right outside of my dorm room by girls I thought were some of my closest friends. When it comes down to it, the definition of a friend to me is unconditional love and support. NEWS FLASH: this, in fact, does not include being two-faced, a one-upper, only there for the good times, and would ditch you in a heartbeat if something better were to come up.

It sounds cheesy but as an only child, my only wish was to have a sister. Someone I could confide in and have as a best friend from the second we popped out of the womb. Since I was undoubtedly the devil growing up, it was understandable that my parents decided against bestowing me a lifelong companion.

Now I’m not trying to get sappy but this has been a really eye-opening time in my life. Although I am nearly 250 miles from home, I know without a doubt my parents always have my back and have my best interest at heart. Whether it be a quick FaceTime chat or a simple text, I can truly say my parents have been my best friends since the day I was born and will be for the rest of my life.

Without my parents, I would not have gotten the countless opportunities to see the world, to be able to openly joke about sex and to tell them anything and everything that was on my mind. Although they are kin they are truly the greatest humans and I am beyond grateful to have not only two wonderful role models, parents, best friends all wrapped into one. I am beyond blessed with two of the goofiest and most loving people on this planet.

Without these two, I would not be going to the college of my dreams (DePaul University) in one of the greatest cities in the world, I wouldn’t have my baby mini cooper, and I most importantly I would not have a beautiful place to call home and recollect my childhood. Now this didn’t come easy, I know there were many sacrifices made in order to allow me to chase my dreams. (Thanks Tootsie for giving up your convertible BMW)

Now don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t all sunshine and butterflies in the Gardner household. From the age of 10-16 I was ungrateful, selfish and a royal pain in the ass, but the beauty of this is that I never went to bed not feeling loved, and always knew that my parents were so in love and that was never going change that. This made me so undeniably lucky because at the age of 19 I realized not all people had that kind of love.

When deciphering all of my relationships and seeing what went wrong, I decided to let go of what’s passed and be happy that the few relationships I have maintained are the only ones I need. At the end of the day, I know how lucky I am to have best friends that aren’t going anywhere.

Thank you, Brenda and Todd, for being my rocks. I love you more than you’ll ever know. (Macy & Oliver you're alright I guess)