As I am nearing the end of my sophomore year of college, I’ve been thinking a lot about the past and how far I have come from the little girl who had a bad speech impediment, round, purple Harry Potter-style glasses and was a little rowdy. I've become a 19-year-old nursing student stressed about what the future holds. There have been ups and downs but these are just a few things I would like to tell my younger self.
Dear Mini Me,
At this moment, you are probably just coming home from dance class, soccer practice or Lauren's house. You may be wondering, why is future you writing this letter to you right now? The answer is simple and complicated at the same time. Simply, I am writing this to give you advice and let you know everything turns out the way it is supposed to. Know that now and understand it because it will save you a lot of sleepless nights and worries.
I will tell you this: sixth grade will be a hard year, and things will happen that will test you. You will experience some sad firsts, and you will think a lot of it is your fault, so know that it's not and you'll be okay in the end.
Moving
You have already done some of the big moves; Las Vegas to Braintree, Aunt Jan's house to our own place in Monatiquot Village. Just know that you aren't done moving yet; you'll move a few more times. It doesn't matter where you are––Braintree or Canton or at school––home is where the family is. You will always be moving, whether if it's apartments or just moving on in your life. I know you don't like to let go of things but just know that moving on and letting go is not a bad thing. It will be the best decision for you in most cases. Life is constantly in motion, so learn that you can and should slow down and enjoy life as it comes. You are a kid. Don't feel the need to grow up so fast. Enjoy your childhood while you can.
Friendships
Friends are the family you can choose, so pick wisely and know that you can stop being friends with people if they aren't right for you anymore. All of your friendships will serve a purpose. You'll make friends and you'll lose some. Know the ones that stuck by you are worth it and the ones that don't served their purpose in your life. Some friendships will end for stupid reason and some will end for extremely good reasons, like they betrayed your trust, and other friends will have your back for a long time, so learn to spot the difference between friends of convenience and true friends.
Boys and relationships
Boys can and will often be annoying, but know that like your friendships, all of your relationships have served a purpose, even if it doesn't seem like that at the time. Know that relationships are hard, and some are not going to be completely worth it. If it starts to dwindle that's a sign to end it; don't over stay just out of convenience. Know that not all boys will be the same. Some will be good, some will be complete assholes, and often these are the same guy, just at different times.
Family
The family will continue to be the family. We fight, we make up, or we hold stupid petty grudges, but either way there isn't much change in the family department. Know that the family will always be there for you, and you will need them to help you throughout your life. Also, do me a favor and cut Mom some slack when you become a freshman in high school; she has always done the best she could for you and Dave so appreciate her a little more.
You
This is the biggest topic of this letter for many reasons. I am the only one who truly gets what is going on in your mind because I am you, just an older and a little bit wiser. Take time to focus on yourself and what you need and want from every aspect of life. Slow down. Don't rush to grow up in ways that you will end up regretting in the future; you're a kid so stay one as long as you can. Learn to love yourself (and I don't mean be selfish or full of yourself) but learn that you are going to be your own biggest enemy. Stop overthinking everything. Life will work out the way it's meant to. Know that when you do grow up you become a very resilient, kind, loving person who is still trying to figure out who she is.
Good luck and with lots of love,
You
