I am a twenty-four-year-old woman.
I like used books, grabbing a drink with my friends, and buying plane tickets on a whim when I know my bank account can't handle it. I am a writer, a daughter, a friend, an insomniac, and an egg sandwich enthusiast.
I do not want kids.
I am everything that I listed above, and more, but when people find out that I don't want children, nothing else is ever remembered. "Of course you want kids. What are you talking about?" This is the response that I hear. So let me get it out there loud and proud. I am not going to have children. I am not going to be a mother. And that's okay.
I have nothing against mothers. I love my mom. I love the mothers of my friends. I think being a mom is one of the hardest and probably one of the most rewarding jobs out there. That doesn't mean that I want to take part in it. I don't understand why so many people have a problem with that. Some people grow up knowing that they will have kids. I just happened to grow up knowing the opposite.
It is due to this singular aspect that I've been called selfish. I've been told that I'm not fulfilling my duty as a woman. I have been told that I will live a life full of regret. All because of a decision that is all my own and no one else's. But everyone likes to talk like they have a say in my life.
I am not selfish for not wanting to bring a child into this world who I, to be quite honest, don't want. I am still just as much of a woman as a mother with fourteen kids. And what exactly is my "duty as a woman?" Please stop saying that to me. And I will not live a life of regret for living the way I want... So go ahead and do the "regretting" for me.
This is for anyone who has ever been told they aren't following the "normal" lifestyle. I'm here and I understand. I understand what it's like when those circling comments start to make you doubt your own decisions. I understand how frustrating it is to repeat yourself only to deal with more questions or condescending looks. I understand... And I want you to know that however you are living is absolutely perfect as long as you're happy and doing what you want.
I will not have kids. I will not let people bring me down anymore because of it.
I am young. I am sure. I am a woman. I am me.
