I'm a firm believer in mind over matter. I take words of wisdom very seriously, and word very hard to apply them to my daily life and mentality. At times, you may feel like there are many other factors deciding your life and your future for you. Which, I'll be honest, is sometimes true. Some circumstances (money, guardians, location) greatly affect what you can and can't do. But only you can control how you react and how you grow each day. Here are the life lessons that have made me more self aware and feel more in control of my life.

EFFORT: If you truly give everything your best shot, you have nothing to be ashamed of.

A professor I had my sophomore and junior year of college is my least favorite professor I've ever had. She was NEVER satisfied with any of the work we turned in and would force us to make changes upon changes all the way up until the deadline. But I didn't realize how valuable this lesson was until I was in my first committed relationship (I know, big leap, stay with me). That professor subliminally taught me that things can and will change constantly, and it's my responsibility to never give up. I am now the type of person who can't walk away from something without exhausting my last bit of effort on it. If the other person in the relationship chooses to walk away, so be it. At least you can say you did everything you could do keep moving forward and it isn't your fault. You can apply this to your school work as well. Even if you are up until 2AM the night before, finish that essay, reread it twice, and add just one more citation before printing it out. Use every hour you have to improve upon everything you do.

CONFLICT: It's okay to keep your mouth shut.

I am not at all suggesting you keep quiet about people who do harm to you or people that take advantage of you. Definitely speak up and make sure your are protecting yourself in those situations. What I mean by this is that you don't have to voice every opinion you have. You are going to be around people that are ignorant, vapid, or oblivious. But you don't have to get into an argument with every person you disagree with. It's not called cowardice, it's called maturity. Be the bigger person. Acknowledge that one person's ignorance will not affect your mindset. Just walk away knowing you are comfortable enough with your own code of ethics to not have to get into an argument over someone else's. There are a lot of people in the world with a lot of opinions, but there is also a time and place for debate. Please keep your political stance to yourself on the train so that we can all go about our days peacefully.

RELIGION: There is no right answer.

And you should therefore be accepting, nurturing, and respectful of EVERYONE'S opinions. Some people don't like to hear it, but your religion is not the only religion in the world. Everybody has the human right to believe what they choose on the inside. What sickens me is that so many people demonize others' religious beliefs without truly understanding them. One of the most welcoming people I know is my friend, Rebecca. Rebecca has a very strong religious faith, more-so than most people I know, but has been nothing but curious and accepting of differing faiths. She encourages conversations about different beliefs and strives to understand different people's points of view without judgement. She is a stunning example of what it means to take what your faith teaches you and apply it to being a respectful, truly good person.

HEALTH: Fad diets are a scam.

I am by no means telling people to lose weight. How you feel about your body is your business, and I would NEVER body shame anyone. I've been on both sides of the spectrum. Two years ago, I was 100lbs heavier than I am now. So I'm talking from experience when I say if you are serious about losing weight, no amount of food replacements are going to help you do it. No, replacing cream cheese with fat free cream cheese is NOT going to help. Whole grain bread is actually not that much better for you than white bread. You know what IS going to help you lose weight? Cutting back on ALL cream cheese and ALL bread. Diets high in protein and low in carbs are the best. I strictly ate dry spinach salads and seafood for a great portion of those two years. I know it's not as delicious as spaghetti and pizza, but you have to like the feeling of eating healthy rather than just the taste of the healthy foods.

CONFIDENCE: It's not the end of the world / What's the worst that can happen?

I know, I know. This is probably one of the most overused life lessons known to man. But I didn't truly understand it until I was about 13 years old and a psychiatrist did a workshop to explain it. No matter what you do, you will not cause the apocalypse. A meteor shower isn't going to rain down on Earth killing all it's inhabitants. And you will not die. So why not do something brave? After all, nothing is temporary. So go ahead, ask her out. The worst that can happen is that she will say no. But the sting of rejection is incredibly temporary in the grand scheme of thinks. You won't be worried about it when you're 60, so why be worried about it now? I've stopped asking myself "why not?" and have started acting upon the things I wish to accomplish. And look. I'm still alive.

I hope that these little tidbits give you just a bit more comfort in knowing that you do have control who you are as a person. No matter you socioeconomic situation, religious beliefs, age, gender, sexuality, and upbringing, you are not done growing. You have the power to change your life until the day you die. So no more excuses, no more "too late" or "oh well." Mind over matter, damnit! There is nothing holding you back from being a kind version of the person you want to be with good intentions.