Growing up, you tend to develop core friendships with certain people. As years go by, you tend to “lose” many friends. I use the term “lose” loosely because maybe you weren’t really friends to begin with. Have you ever wondered what it takes to really be a friend to someone?

Have you asked yourself if you are a real friend? Are you supporting your friend’s dreams even if you think they are hard to reach? Are you really listening when your friend is telling you something about themselves? Are you really getting to know your friend? Do you know his/her/their favorite color? Favorite TV show? Favorite pastime?

The good news is even if you don’t know the answers to all of those questions you can still be close, but the point is are you really listening as much as you like to be heard? A friendship involves two people both contributing to it. For example, I have a childhood friend and we don’t live too close to each other but we still make sure to talk every week or even every other week. There is no awkwardness, no need to feel bad about not talking every day because let’s face it; we are adults now with many things on our plates and talking every day sometimes just isn’t possible.

You must nurture your friendships just like you would a romantic relationship. You need to make sure that the person you are friends with knows you care about them as much as they care about you. A simple text once in a while of “Hey, how are you?” may not seem like much but if you are down and someone bothered to text you with that, you will feel like they care and that would make you feel better.

Adult friendships are just that- adult.

We don’t need to constantly be in contact, sometimes there is just no time. But at the end of the day, you know who is there for you and who would be there if you needed them. Think of that popular saying, to treat relationships as plants and water them consistently. The same thing applies here, enjoy that friend love because it is some of the purest love out there!