I'm Addicted To "Christmas Crack" | The Odyssey Online
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I'm Addicted To "Christmas Crack"

These are the people putting their trees up, wearing sweaters and baking cookies. If you think this is an article hating on them, you are wrong, my friend.

Kat Balmes
Nov 15, 2016
University of Mississippi
28
I'm Addicted To "Christmas Crack"
google

Every year it happens. The clock strikes twelve on Halloween night and all hell breaks loose. They're everywhere. They're putting up their trees, they're playing carols as loud as possible and it's still pretty hot out but they wear their sweaters anyway.

These people are on drugs. A drug called "Christmas Crack." If you think this is an article hating on "those people" you are so wrong, Pal. My name is Kat, and i'm an addict.....addicted to CHRISTMAS CRACK. I am about to justify everything my fellow addicts are facing. We're all in this together.

1. Why are you already shopping for gifts?


Prices skyrocket around christmas time. Plain red wrapping paper is doubled in price and labeled as "christmas wrapping" for God's sake. Getting a head start makes you (and your wallet) very happy.

2. Don't you have enough decorations and ornaments?


No. Stores release new limited collections every year. This is where the memories are made people! Are you going to put a price on memories? What is wrong with you? (And also, let's face it, you need to get your hands on those chrome reindeer salt and pepper shakers before anyone else.)

3. What about Thanksgiving?


Don't EVEN get me started. We glorify gluttony, on top of the fact that we are celebrating the fact that our white ancestors destroyed an entire culture.

4. It's still in the 70s here, why are you wearing sweaters?


Okay, i understand where you're coming from, but at the same time, I need to get some use out of my boots and sweaters while I can. I don't want them to go to waste.

5. We've been in the car for 5 minutes and you've already hit repeat on "All I Want For Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey. Buddy the elf said it best:


6. You're already watching Christmas movies?


Yes, but I have to strategically plan which movies I watch and when. I can handle a Christmas Story now, but once I watch Elf, I'm in full Christmas Crack mode and cannot be sedated.

7. It's barely November, just calm down. No.

There you have it folks, in case you needed a few extra excuses for starting the season early! Have a blessed holiday season and make some memories!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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