Over the past couple of years, the biggest thing that I have learned is that you will not get an "I'm sorry" every time that you deserve one. Even when you are 100 percent positive that you should get one, you won't. Many times, this has more to do with the other person's ego than with anything else. And with that, I've learned that you have to accept this. Really, you are accepting the "I'm sorry" that was never said.
Do this for yourself. Do it because it takes a little piece of you every single day to carry the pain with you. Never, ever do this for the other person. This is not to give them the benefit of the doubt or to give them another chance when they do not deserve it. Do it because when you are bathing in anger and sadness, you are a different person. You look at the world in a worse way because of one person's actions and that is not fair to you or the other people in your life. I will not lie about how hard this really is when it's put into practice. It took me years to figure it out. Over and over I was broken, and over and over again, I never got that apology. When the situation was over, I carried that pain for months...OK, years, if I'm being honest. I never understood what I did to deserve that. One day, I realized that this wasn't hurting that other person; it was only hurting me. And why would I give them that satisfaction? I didn't want to do that anymore.
Essentially, I apologized to myself on their behalf and that was going to have to be good enough. I was going to have to live with that and move on for the sake of bettering myself. So I could stop looking at the world as such an evil thing when only one person has lived up to that. So, I'm done letting you ruin things for me. I'm done letting you tear me apart a little bit every day. It's my turn to decide how my life goes. I'm finally letting it go, for my sake. You should know that you don't have the power anymore and that alone makes me feel like I have finally done something for myself. This one's for you, even though you've never deserved anything from me.
