I was born and raised in the small town of Sturgis, Michigan. No, not Sturgis, South Dakota. If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me that, I wouldn't need student loans.

I never realized just how different the world was outside of my small hometown until I started college almost four years ago. I traveled from the most southwest part of the state to the east side. Most of the people I have met throughout the last four years live relatively close to OU and have never really had the small town experience. Let me tell ya, my mind was blown when I moved to Rochester. Here are ten reasons why...

1. Two words: MICHIGAN LEFT.

I'm sorry, but what are these things and why do they exist? I can't even tell you just how many Michigan lefts I had to make to get where I was going my first year here. As much as I love wasting my gas in order to turn my car around twelve times to get to the McDonald's across from campus, I could find a way to live without these left turns from Hell in my life (Maybe I'm exaggerating a tad, but you get my point).

2. Rush Hour. I can't.

First question, when does this, "hour of rush", even actually start?? Can we at least get some consistency, please?

Second question, why do they claim it lasts an hour when I have learned from experience that it most certainly does not? They should call it, "1-3 hours of pure chaos and stupidity mixed with a whole lot of road rage".

Last question, HOW DOES THIS EVEN BEGIN? WHY CAN'T THE PERSON IN THE FRONT JUST DRIVE FASTER???

3. Is it just me, or does the human population seem to quadruple in size on a daily basis?

I swear, I have never, and I mean NEVER, experienced such a constant flow of people in my life. Everywhere I go, man. Every. Single. Place. THERE ARE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE! Do residents of larger cities not have to sleep? Are they descendants of vampires? Why do they never go home? To the people that like to invade my personal bubble and cause me internal panic...have you never heard of Netflix?? Go home, sit on your couch, and be a lazy piece of crap like the rest of us.

4. This place got malls on malls on malls.

In Sturgis, we have about two stores worth purchasing clothing from, and if that's if you're one of the lucky ones who can actually afford it. Here in Rochester, it seems as though there is a shopping establishment around every corner. Like, no wonder you gotta have three jobs and probably sell your limbs in order to live here! I am a broke college student with no self-control. I soothe my over-anxious and stress-filled mind by binge eating and shopping. CITIES LIKE THIS RUIN PEOPLE LIKE ME.

5. Why do the people I see in Wal-Mart actually look like socially acceptable, fully functioning human beings?

I feel like you might think I'm kidding right now. No, no I'm not. This is not a drill. People here enter grocery stores with public appropriate clothing and brushed hair. Back home, I am the socially acceptable adult strolling through the aisles looking like I have my life together. BUT HERE....I am the troll that lives under the bridge. SMH.

6. Soooo, what happened to all of the back roads....?

Okay, this is something that really grinds my gears. Why on earth am I required to get on the freeway EVERY SINGLE TIME I must travel somewhere. Wanna go to your favorite restaurant? Better plan it around traffic cause them freeways get packed around dinner time! Wanna go see a movie? Hop on that there freeway, pal. Am I the only one that believes back roads to be a much faster and more efficient path for travel??

7. Speaking of restaurants....THERE ARE SO MANY HERE!

When I go out with friends back home, we have about three solid options when it comes to nicer, sit-down restaurants. Two of which are hit-or-miss when it comes to quality of service and food. If you want to go somewhere new and probably a bit more pleasant, be prepared to drive up to an hour away. I see more reliable options just looking out of my apartment window here in Rochester. (Having a boyfriend that spoils you and never says "no" to dinner dates is very very handy here, btw) Let's just say, I am not going hungry.

8. Is there even roadkill here, or does rush hour just scare away all of the woodland creatures?

This one is pretty self-explanatory. Less dead animals. Which, don't get me wrong, makes me extremely happy, but it just makes me wonder....why? Where did the animals go? Are they hiding, did they migrate to the west side? These are the questions that haunt me. People back home treat roadkill like a delicacy; they scoop that carcass up and serve it for dinner. (Not me personally because I am somewhat civilized, but it is a common concept, believe it or not)

9. This one makes me laugh, but it is a real concern of mine. Where is all the corn??

As soon as you enter my hometown the first thing you will notice is....nothing. There's really not a whole lot going on. Besides corn. Yes, corn. Corn fields everywhere. My first job was corn stalk detasseling in the seventh grade. For those that don't think this is a real thing, google it. Yes, it's legal, and yes, it was awful. To all you big city dwellers, just be thankful that you will never know the feeling of waking up at the crack of dawn so you can walk through corn fields, with the always-present aroma of cow s@%t (Cows are also a common sight in small farm towns like Sturgis. These mammals are where big cities get their dairy products from) lingering in the air around you, for 8-9 hours a day.

10. Camo and confederate flags. Please don't get me started. But has anyone else noticed that you can actually see most of the people here in Rochester?

Okay, that was an awful joke. But, come on. We live in Michigan, people. Sturgis was said to be the number one redneck city in Michigan in a recent article that circled Facebook. Confederate flaggers of the Dirty Sturg...do you wave those flags because you think it's a requirement of being a redneck, or do you actually know the meaning behind it? Either way, you live in a state that is as north of the country as you can get. Read up on the Civil War and you might realize the irony of the situation. But anyways....'Merica.

P.S. I would lay off the camo attire before you start attracting animals who think you look like their bathroom.

Hopefully, nobody was offended by the statements in this article. Even though they are all my honest thoughts and opinions, I'm just hoping some of the small-towners out there will find some humor and truth behind what I've said. In the end, though, as much as I love the city, I will always know my roots and where I came from. The Dirty Sturg will forever hold a special (but very, very, very small) place in my heart.