Being a college student has allowed me to stay up late nights and create bonds with great people. I've had so many amazing heart-to-hearts in dorm rooms with newly found friends, during which conversations ranged anywhere between love, sex, politics and personal issues.
I can recall one night during my junior year when I was having a discussion about self love with one of my friends. We were both talking about how important it is to express self love. We talked about the benefits of loving ourselves, yet, my friend posed the question of how exactly do you show "love to yourself." At that moment, I was lost for words because I could not think of any examples.
That following day I created a list that I try very hard to follow. It’s just eight practices that I try to be mindful of so that I am taking time out to appreciate myself and express "Self Love."
1. 15-minute rule
When you wake up in the morning allow yourself time to just sit in idle. Even if you have to wake up a little earlier to do so. Do not check your text messages, emails, or social media accounts. Stop allowing the world to tap into your mind before you are fully awake. Take that time to reflect, clear your head or possibly pray if you are religious. Our lives are pretty busy so this exercise can give us the free time we don't usually get during the day.
2. Stay away from negativity.
While number two sounds cliche or a bit easy, I find this the hardest for a lot of people to do. Sometimes we allow our environment to dictate our emotions. If you are hanging around a bunch of pessimists, often times their energy will eventually rub off on you. My advice is to be mindful of who you allow into your space and stay away from anything that disrupts your inner peace. Always remember that you can control what types of energy that you allow into your personal life. You cannot control what's around you, but you can control what you react to. Everything is a choice.
3. What do I love about me?
In life, we our own biggest critics. We’re so hard on ourselves because we feel that people around us will see all of our flaws. Truthfully, no one usually does. Create a list of everything that you absolutely love about yourself no matter what it is. It could be anything whether it’s physical, or character traits. Take that list and post it onto a mirror so that whenever you wake up in the morning you are reminded of how amazing you are.
4. Take care of your body.
A part of loving yourself is showing your appreciation to your body. It’s important you develop a healthy lifestyle by eating right and exercising. When you neglect to care for your body, you're neglecting to care about your all around being. So take time to eat right, moisturize your body, take care of your hair, and anything that you need to do to live a healthy lifestyle.
5. Clean house
Try to keep your personal space tidy, whether it’s your house, apartments, or dorm room. A clean area gives you a fresh mind so that you’re able to think a lot easier. Do not be afraid to get rid of things you don't need. This exercise is great because it can teach you how to let go of things that are not in the physical form. Letting go of old shoes, clothes, and jewelry can help you emotionally by maybe letting go of negative relationships or emotions that you hold on to.
6. Stop comparing.
When learning to express self love, it’s important that you stop comparing yourself to others. Often times we look at other people and admire all of the greatness that they possess, and we forget we are also great in our own right. Remember to stay in your own lane. There is no one in this world like you. There’s a difference between admiration and comparison, so be conscious of the category you fall into. Using terms such as “I wish I was” or “I’m nothing like [insert name here]” will hinder your own personal growth and stop you from loving you.
7. Pray/ Meditate
If you are religious, praying to your higher power allows you to gain answers to the questions you ask. Your creator made you the way you are for a reason and like I mentioned in number six, no one in this world is created like you.
For those who are not into prayer, meditation helps you create a peace of mind and allows you to clear your thoughts of negativity. Our media is constantly putting subliminal messages in our heads so it’s important we take time out to tap into our inner selves or our spiritual selves.
8. Do something you're good at.
People like to hear good praise for the things that they do. For example, if you are a good cook, continue to share your cooking because it makes others happy. It also makes you happy because you are putting a smile on the faces of others. It’s stimulating to our inner selves to know we are doing something good. However, try not to do things for the approval of others because that would be the opposite of self love.
I hope that this list can give you a head start or just an idea of how to express love to yourself. It seems quite easy to love another because we are able to see them from a different perspective.
Keep in mind, we cannot love others to our fullest capacity if we do not love ourselves first. Always remember that no one knows the person you are like you do and no one will love you like you.
If you have any ideas of how to express self love comment them below***
