Rushing for a sorority your freshman year of college is what some girls look forward to for years. They can’t wait to be part of a sisterhood, serve others, and have cute shirts with their letters on them. Four months ago I had the same thoughts. But, something held me back from rushing. I regretted not rushing as soon as my friends started talking about how great it was and how I was missing out. But, what could I do? It was too late. A couple weeks later one of my friends texted me saying that they needed a few more girls to join her sorority in order to meet the quota; this was my second chance! But, something was still holding me back. I wasn’t 100 percent sure that pledging was worth the time and money, along with the potential peer pressure to drink, so I ultimately said no. I sometimes still wonder if I should have pledged, but I am content without it and that’s all I can ask for. I learned a lot in those couple weeks of trying to decide what I was going to do and for that I am grateful.
1. I don’t have to go Greek to enjoy college
Watching "Legally Blonde" in high school put this certain image in my head that being in a sorority is THE WAY to have fun in college. I will admit that I have major #FOMO and was afraid that I would regret not being in a sorority for the rest of my life. I mean what would I even do in college if I don’t have formals to go to and sisterhood events to be a part of? But, by not rushing, I was able to get involved in other things that I love.
2. Stop caring about what other people think of you
One of the “pros” on my "pros versus cons" list (yes, I make those) was that I would be able to take cute pictures with my sisters to post on Instagram. I’m serious, I wanted to join because it would show all of my friends on social media that I had fun and that I had friends. There’s nothing wrong with taking cute pictures, but creating a certain image of myself for others can be dangerous. Instead, create an image of yourself that portrays your heart and soul. It’s cliche but true that what you look like on the inside is all that really matters.
3. Community can be found anywhere if you invest your time and energy
The main reason I wanted to join a sorority was for the sisterhood and sense of community. I am an extrovert and love meeting new people, so the idea of having more than 100 friends basically given to me was super appealing. But, I realized, that not only was I ignoring the friends I already had by saying that I needed to be in a sorority to make friends, but I wasn’t trying to find community anywhere else. As soon as I decided not to pledge, I was able to seek out community in other places. I quickly found what I was looking for in CCF (Campus Christian Fellowship). No, I’ll never have a big or little, but I have found some amazing mentors, people that are always there for me, and my best friends.
4. Looking back and second guessing yourself does more harm than good
For weeks after I decided not to pledge I kept thinking “What if?” That question is so dangerous because while I was looking back at what could have been, I wasn’t able to look forward to what will be. I was blind to all the great things in front of me and was missing out on life by trying to live in the past. Open your eyes to the beauty around you, enjoy the present and look forward to the future.
5. God has a plan and is in control
I am a strong believer that God has a plan for my life, and it is my responsibility to follow that plan. But, I’m also a huge control freak and like to plan my future. So when wondering if I made the right decision, I had to remember that God has a plan greater than any plans I make. Me not joining a sorority didn’t surprise him, so he clearly had something else in mind for me. For some people, being in a sorority is part of God’s plan, because that’s where He is going to use them, but not for me. God is going to use me in other ways to reach other people. And that’s ok.
6. Everyone is different and that’s a good thing!
Building off number five, it’s OK for me not to be in a sorority. It doesn’t make me weird or anti-social, it just wasn’t for me. Everyone has their own niche, and that’s what makes the world so beautiful. We all need to find what, as one of my friends put it, is “life-giving.” If everyone was able to find the thing that they are passionate about and love doing and actually do it, I think we would all be much more joyful and content. Instead of doing something because other people do it or say that you should do it, find what you love and pursue it!