Ah yes, 'tis the season where everyone begins to die because of germs! It seems as if no matter how many vaccines you get to prepare you for this time of the year, you still end up laying face down in your bed for a solid week at some point. Not to mention, it is always during the most important time of the semester: midterms. And I, unfortunately, have fallen into this trap like many of you. With the help of my friend, Michael Scott, below will be the stages of a cold so you'll know just how long you have until it is finally over.
Stage 1: The sniffle.
You wake up one morning and your nose is a little more stuffy than usual. Maybe your back will ache a bit or you sneeze a time or two. No big deal right? Deep down inside though, you know it is happening and that the sickness that has dragged your friends down into the abyss is slowly creeping its way towards you.
Stage 2: Denial.
The symptoms start getting stronger and never seem to leave. You know that you should be hydrating more, taking more vitamin C and doing everything and anything else that you can... but you can't bring yourself to do it. You will not be defeated by this cold!
Stage 3: The fever.
This is the turning point. Now you know you're done for, yet you're still fighting it. Maybe it is just a little hotter in this room than normal or could it possibly be that this t-shirt is too thick? What is a fever? I don't know what that is! I don't have one! Not me, no sir.
Stage 4: Defeat.
Productivity? No thank you. Please excuse me until further notice as I lay in bed and cry because my friends are now all healed and living their lives doing fun activities, while I cannot even stand up without snot dripping down my face. What did I do to deserve this?
Stage 5: Wait a second...
One day you wake up and you can actually breathe! You still feel a tad groggy, but it doesn't matter. You can finally venture into the outside world again because you're starting to feel like yourself again!
Stage 6: It. Is. Over.
Finally, you are up and at it again. The cold is finally gone. The downside though? You probably just sent someone (or maybe a few others) spiraling down into the germ infested abyss now that you've returned.
