If you have ever been involved in any kind of team, then you know they are just the worst. Learning team work, the value of work ethic, and how to self analyze are terrible skills that are in no way helpful to me as an adult. In addition, I've never met anyone I liked or found any life long friends that bettered me as a person through group activities. Whether it was a dance team, sports team, scholastic team, or online team, you know what I am talking about. I have been doing color guard for seven years now, and this will be my eighth. Flag band has literally consumed my life, and if you understand, then you'll agree why color guard is literally the worst.
1. Human interaction is terrible.
Why on earth would I want to speak to other people who have the same interests as me, as well as similar goals? Who thought that was a good idea? Why would I want to spend time around people who like to do what I do--and do it well?
2. Learning how to self analyze and learning how to be part of a single unit are useless skills to me.
We know that in color guard, 99 percent of the time, we can be doing more. Better under body, hold your free hand longer, more performance, better posture, paying more attention to the 'and counts.' That's not even breaking the surface of what we have to think about in a single second while practicing and performing. The box can't tell every single member what they are doing wrong, or what they could do more of, so the ability to self analyze becomes key in our activity. And that takes effort. I say again, why on earth would I want to do something requiring effort? We are always expected to do the most. And yeah, it is really cool when all the flags and weapons go around as one solid unit on the field (or floor), and being one ensemble instead of many individuals is great and all, but there is absolutely no need for blending in with and cooperating with your peers or future coworkers in the adult world. So why would I waste my time on that nonsensery?
3. Color guard keeps me so busy during the fall and winter, and sometimes even the summer, that I have no time to get into trouble.
MOM MAYBE ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET INTO SHENANIGANS AND DO LOTS OF ILLEGAL THINGS AND BURN DOWN A BUILDING. IT'S NOT A PHASE, IT'S WHO I AM.
Right. But really, I had/have no time for activities that do not benefit me or my well-being because my schedule is so jam packed with color guard. I am practicing five to seven days of the week during the season. Weekends are never off, as we have football games, contests, and exhibitions. Sometimes more than one in a single day!
4. Lifelong friends are nowhere to be found in this sport.
I have not met a single person through color guard that has become a dear friend that I will always care for. I have not met the best people of my life. I have not found true friendship in the activity, and I will never be truly grateful that I invested so much time in it and into the relationships I have because of it. [I know I am being sarcastic and satirical, but this is starting to make me emotional, even speaking in opposites.]
5. Our alumni are just okay.
The rest of the marching band has pretty alright alumni, but color guard alumni are usually just plain. They don't do anything amazing or interesting, such as form the Alumni Color Guard and perform a feature at the Reunion show, support us with fundraisers, or shower us with love. They never ever spin with us, and they never tell us how wonderful we look as an ensemble. [But really, color guard alumni across the activity are literally the best ever, and I dare not even joke that they are less than 'okay,' because God knows I would not be where I am without mine.]
6. Growing to be a better person is stupid.
Why on earth--Okay, I can't keep it up anymore. Surrounded by beautiful people, who are indeed my lifelong friends and alumni, with glorious hopes and dreams (even though I do often have somber moments), I become a better person every time I go to practice. They inspire me to not only be better at color guard, but to be my best self. They encourage me when I am so discouraged in life, and because they help me through it, I grow. They show me love when I feel completely unlovable, and because they help me through it, I grow a little more. They show me how to not be a total rude mess to everyone I speak to, even when I am totally a rude mess to them, and boy do I grow from that. But we don't only grow from our friends in the activity. We grow from the situations we face, the work ethic we instilled in ourselves, and the camaraderie we have nurtured, just to name a few.
Honestly, there is no other activity I would have rather done in my high school and college life. These memories will stick with me forever, as well as the friendships I have made. I couldn't be more grateful for everything the activity has done for me, and I can truly say that because of color guard, every day I am growing to become my best self.
