Why You Should Marry The Marching Band Kid

Why You Should Marry The Marching Band Kid

Marching band and relationships have more in common than you may think.
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There are few groups of people in this world who I personally believe are always "good." And marching band kids are one of them.

Marching band kids are really good at taking direction.

It is our job to make sure we are in charge of our spot on the field. If we mess up, there is the potential for injury. Not only that, but when you get into a band that has over four-hundred people in it there is no way the director is going to be able to put each and every person in their spot for every set.

When we're married, it's going to help because we're not going to have to be told to take the trash out or put some clothes through the wash. We're going to see that it needs to be done and then we'll do it.

We're not the type to give up.

If you've ever been outside in 100+ degree heat and been able to march/walk/run several miles, then you know what it means to really push through. We marching in severe heat, snow, rain, and everything in-between. There's not much that we won't do to figure out how to get something done, and get it right. "Practice makes perfect" is not our mantra, "perfect practice makes perfect" is how we roll.

Mark time calves.

Depending on how your school does mark time, your significant other is going to have the best calves you've ever seen. There's no way around it! To keep your upper body still there are a lot of legs involved. Especially when we rep something over and over again.

We are severely punctual.

Here is my thought process as a college marching kid:

"Ok, call time is five hours before kickoff, so that means I need to be on the field at 8am with the clarinets. That means I need to park my car at least fifteen to twenty minutes beforehand. To be there that early I need to pick up my carpool about twenty minutes before that, so I need to wake up around 6:50am to be able to eat some breakfast and drink water before it gets hot out and I dehydrate myself. So the 8:30a. band call means waking up just over an hour early."

After talking to many fellow marching friends, I am certain that at least 90% of the band has this same thought process. "Be early to the call, which means be earlier than that."

You're going to have the best wedding ever.

I've heard many stories from friends, family, and family friends that they managed to get friends to come play live songs for them. If they met in college, sometimes they even get a pep band to come and play some school songs. It's just as nerdy as it sounds, but you get to have college kid fun again for a short while. Who wouldn't want to relieve some of the best times of their life for a few minutes!

Your children will probably play instruments.

I say "probably," but if you met in band, then chances are that you will start your kid on lessons in early elementary school, get them to start a second (maybe even third) instrument by high school, and then they can woo anyone they want. Ok, I'm kidding, but really there have been several studies done about how learning to play or sing or even listening to music makes you smarter.

We make time, even when we're busy.

A typical week in my life that ends in a game day involves three two-hour rehearsals, a one hour sectional, and then game day can be anywhere from ten to fourteen hours. And that's just a one credit class. There are friends of mine in this band who are aspiring engineers, architects, music performance majors, and pre-vet. Work loads can get up to 18 or more credit hours during the marching season. I don't even know when these people sleep, but they are the most hard-working and well organize people I know. These are the people that are going to have color-coded calendars for all three of their children and every car ride and carpool is going to have snacks. That's the person I want to be with. Heck, that's the person I want to be!

We look dang good in a uniform.

We know how dorky we look, but even the crowd can admit that when you see a band of four-hundred people all wearing the same thing, it's pretty awesome. Maybe even scary depending on the amount of screaming going on.

We understand what real commitment is.

Band kids are not the type to throw in the towel. A lot of us don't even know what the phrase means. Starting a relationship is like starting a new half-time show for us. We are given very little and have to be able to see the big picture. There may be small amounts of kicking and screaming when it gets hard, but we don't tear up our drill charts, throw them in the air, and walk off the field leaving our instruments behind. We take a breather, maybe do some stretches, and come back with a cool head and a mindset to make it better.

We know how to communicate.

If we didn't communicate with each other in band, we wouldn't be a band. It's all about the ensemble and having everything mesh together, meld as one, and be one sound. Translating that to a relationship, that means that we're not going leave you out of the loop. If you don't know something, it will probably make us uncomfortable.

Hard work through it all.

I hope this one is self explanatory. We rehearse in 100 degree heat, snow, rain, and perform in anything that comes our way. A little fight isn't going to discourage us, and neither is someone leaving some dishes out every once in a while. We understand that there may be tiny things that someone does wrong. Things like being too far to the left, or missing a step off, or even being a little late, but that one action isn't a reflection of all the love and care put into the band. Wait, this is about relationships. Little actions are not going to change our whole opinion of you. Someone has to royally screw up for a band kid to change their opinion about you. And if we married you, chances are you're in the clear.

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it

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Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

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5 Reasons Why I Don't Want Kids

Procreating. It's not for everyone.

dambro64
dambro64
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My cousin had a baby last August. She's absolutely beautiful and I love her to death, but she doesn't change my mind when it comes to wanting kids when I'm older. Truth is, I don't want kids. I'm sure everyone says this at some point in their life, and maybe I will change my mind in the future, but kids kind of freak me out.

Maybe I'm just not the most maternal person, but here's why having kids, at least for now, isn't on my bucket list.

1. Giving birth.

I know, I know, it's a beautiful thing, the miracle of life or whatever, but go watch a birthing video and then come tell me how beautiful it really is. Everything from a woman's water breaking, to actually giving birth just grosses me out, to be honest.

The thought of having to push something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a lemon is just absolutely terrifying. I have a pretty average to above average pain tolerance, but no matter how well you can deal with pain, that shit is obviously not a pleasant experience.

2. The responsibility.

You have to do everything for babies, literally everything. Feed it, dress it, wash it, change it, put it to sleep, and you have to know what a baby wants when it wants it. If I had a baby and it started to cry, I would have no idea what to do. I know plenty of people say that once you have the baby, you automatically know which type of crying is for what need, but that makes no sense to me.

Do babies have different types of cries? How do you know which is which?

I consider myself a pretty responsible person when it comes time to be accountable for myself, but to be accountable for another life form?

I'll put it this way. I have two pet turtles. We got them when I was about twelve or so years old, and I remember being obsessed with them. That lasted for like maybe two weeks, and then I got bored with them, which meant I didn't take care of them. My parents did. Not the best analogy for obvious reasons, but I'm sure you understand what I'm trying to say. In other words, if I can barely take care of a pet, how would I ever be able to take care of a small human?

3. Kids are messy and loud.

Look, I'm not like a total clean freak or anything like that, but my mother definitely is. She used to disinfect sticks so my sister and I could roast marshmallows when we went camping for Girl Scouts. My point is, it's been drilled into my brain that everything has to be wiped down clean, and germs are not my friends.

I hate being around sick people; they freak me out, especially since I get sick so easily. If my baby or child were to get sick, I'd obviously still have to take care of it, which means wiping snot, cleaning vomit, and getting coughed on. I guarantee you, as soon as my child were to get better, I'd get sick.

Don't even get me started on changing dirty diapers.

Also, if there's anything I've learned from my cousin's baby thus far, it's that babies put everything in their mouths. Any object on the ground, their hands, and feet; nothing is safe. Babies don't understand sanitation, so it's not their fault, but I just know that if I had a kid, it would be in a plastic bubble so it could remain as clean as possible.

Babies are also very loud. Back when I worked at a diner, we used to have customers with little kids and babies all the time. If the kid was unhappy for any reason, that child would scream its head off. I never understood how such a big noise could come from such a small human.

4. Kids are expensive AF.

Kids are not cheap. They have an entire laundry list of stuff that needs to be bought for them, and they run out of supplies frequently. I can't imagine how much money people spend on things like diapers, formula, and clothes. Speaking of clothes, babies grow out things quickly. You get one or two good uses of an outfit and that's it. They outgrow it, and they can no longer use it.

Then, as they get older, you've got to think about school, eventually college, and extracurricular activities that they want to do, gifts for Christmas and other holidays. I say all of this, realizing how much my own parents have spent on me and my siblings (thanks, Mom and Dad).

5. Raising kids looks hard.

Knowing how much my sisters and I were pains in the asses for my parents, I can't imagine having to deal with that crap myself. The whole idea of shaping a child into a fully functioning member of society with good morals and conscience sounds like a lot of work.

There have been so many times where I would be at work and I'd have to deal with customers that have their kids with them, and these children are the biggest brats I've ever seen. Rude, disrespectful, obnoxious or disruptive; just the opposite of how kids should act in any public setting.

A big part of the reason I wouldn't want kids is that I see other people's kids and the way they act. It makes me just want to yell at the parents. At least I know that if I do ever decide to have kids, they'll be raised the way I want them to be and they'll behave the way they're supposed to. Appropriately.

In the big picture of things, whether or not you want kids is up to you. It's not meant for everyone and that's not the end of the world. I always get told that I don't mean it when I say I don't want kids, which isn't that big of a deal, but it can get annoying. In my opinion, if a person says they don't want kids, it's not because they think kids are like some evil being or anything like that. It's because they know their limits.

Growing a family is an amazing thing, but it's also different for everyone. No one should be judged for not liking or wanting to have kids. Everyone has different opinions. This one is just mine.

dambro64
dambro64

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