We're glamorous, we're tough, we're vulnerable, intelligent, intuitive, powerful — we can even make babies! We women definitely don't give each other or ourselves the credit we deserve, and it's time someone does. So if you’re a little late on making a New Year’s resolution like I was, here's a list of several resolutions that I think we women should all make in 2016. So without further ado, here are some more feminist-friendly things to think about besides celebrating a ball dropping.
1. Stop calling girls (or anyone) “basic.”
People can be called a lot of things before “basic.” Some examples of slightly more descriptive adjectives may include, but certainly are not limited to: studious, aggressive, outspoken, athletic, introverted, kind, smart, funny — pretty much any word that indicates that someone has even the slightest smidgen of presence and/or worth. No one in this world is basic, and this year, we should try and take the time to get to know each other instead of immediately judging each other based on stereotypes. *Sips Pumpkin Spice Latte daintily.*
2. Quit villainizing your significant other's ex(es).
We all do it. We all stalk our S.O.’s ex-girlfriend's Facebook page every once in a while. Sometimes we do it to get a little more insight into our beloved's past, and sometimes (and this is a habit that we should all knock) we do it to see how we stack up. More often than not, we find that Miss Ex-Boo-Thang doesn’t quite seem like the abominable "psycho-bitch" our current boyfriend or girlfriend makes her out to be. Things just didn't work out between them for some reason or another, and that's OK. It's in the past. But something I've come to realize from my own glamorous dating experiences is that I definitely have some sort of a "type," meaning that a lot of the guys I've dated have had a lot in common. So when you think about it, you probably have at least something in common with their exes — besides a mutual lover. These girls are probably pretty cool and don't deserve your unproductive negativity.
Oh, and on another very important note, if your S.O. actually refers to their ex as a "psycho-bitch," then maybe you should question whether or not you actually want to be with this person. If you do, chances are you'll end up being just another "psycho-bitch" in their book.
3. Stop commenting on each other’s food choices.
Has anyone else noticed how the “cool girl” stereotype (i.e. Jennifer Lawrence) is often seen as “so approachable” and is “just one of the boys” ordering a burger with a side of fries while “all the other girls” always order salads? Does this piss off anyone else? Like, if a sister wants to order a salad, let the sister have a salad! If a sister wants to order a burger, let the sister have a burger! Unless someone is endangering themselves through their eating habits, then why should you care what they order? Eating a burger doesn’t make you a glutton. It also doesn’t make you “more approachable” than your friend who wants a salad, and wanting a salad doesn’t make her “insecure” or mean that she’s “starving herself”. Basically, if you don’t have anything nice or valuable to say, then please just shove your burger or salad or whatever the hell you want into your mouth and pipe down.
4. Sincerely compliment other women on things besides their looks.
Everyone knows that receiving a compliment can drastically improve someone’s day — especially when it’s a truly sincere one. Say there’s a fellow girl in one of your classes who does particularly well in that subject. Maybe compliment her on how well she did on the last test. If there’s a girl who’s great at makeup, compliment her on her artistic rendition of a cat-eye! Either way, compliment her on something that it's clear she worked really hard on. Better yet, ask her to teach you her ways. That way, not only do you acquire a new skill, but you also just might acquire a new lady-friend for your #girlgang. And P.S. — What goes around comes back around.
5. Celebrate the selfie!
Generally speaking, we tend to post selfies when we’re feeling our most confident. I don’t think self-confidence should ever be shamed. If you’re feeling good about yourself, let people know! Self-love can be contagious, and we need to make it a lot more common. So next time you find yourself mindlessly scrolling through your Instagram feed and you see someone’s selfie, maybe stop and double-tap that.
6. Stop saying “sorry.”
This year, remember that you don’t have to apologize before asking a question. Or when someone else bumps into you. Or when you don’t want to get it on with someone. Let’s save the words “I’m sorry” for when we’ve genuinely f’ed up, not for when we’ve just simply existed, ladies. This year, let’s ask ourselves what we can offer the world, not what we owe it.
