It has been ingrained in this generation from day one to listen and learn from the experiences of those that have come before us. To understand there is wisdom to be absorbed from our elders. This is 100% true, but another important fact of life is that the majority of people learn best by doing. That logic must then transfer over to the lessons we learn from life. Making mistakes will teach us more than reading about those same mistakes from autobiographies or textbooks. This got me thinking, what have I already learned from my own life experiences that I feel is imperative to carry with me to college and beyond?
As I begin this transitional stage of my life from an inexperienced teen who gets most of her ideas about life and love from classic films to a professional adult ready to take on the world, most of my wisdom derives from truly embarrassing situations or movie quotes. So, here are a few pieces of advice that I have collected.
1. Don't try to change to please anyone (especially boys).
Most of my setbacks in discovering my own identity stemmed from trying to fit into labels and ideals that others have had for me. For a while, I thought that I had to have the “cute giggle” to garner the attention of that cute boy from summer camp- which only ended in a nosebleed and no returned calls.
2. Find what you're passionate about and stick with it.
I found this out during my later high school years. I felt so bogged down with things I thought would make me more marketable to colleges and future employers that I lost sight of enjoying myself and exploring things that truly made me excited. Don’t expect to be fantastic the first time you try something. You shouldn’t quit something that you enjoy because you don’t feel as successful as others. Remember, you are typically seeing the product of hours of effort from those you aspire to be. As long as it’s not hurting your self-confidence in your ability to succeed, stick with it and learn.
3. Friends are allowed to be seasonal.
Not all friends are meant to be your "Sex and the City" squad. Don’t try to force a relationship into something that it just isn’t. You can have friends that you just hang out with in class or when you need someone to tell you if you actually do look fat in that outfit. That best friend that you’ve had since 4th grade may not last all the way through high school, and that is okay. It just makes your Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda even more special when you find them.
4. Find an outlet.
I’m the kind of person that will let an issue steam for too long and, before you know it, it’s a pot of mushy broccoli that is neither healthy nor useful. Whether it be ranting to a friend or parent, writing everything down in a journal or blog, or even exercise, find an outlet to release disappointment, anger, etc. Grudges can eat you up and make you bitter. Keep yourself free from negative thoughts.
5. Things are only awkward if you make them awkward.
This one I have had lots of experience with. I am all too eager to sit back from social situations out of fear that I will make them awkward. However, I’ve learned that your attitude has a strong effect on the outcome of these interactions. You can oftentimes be an inhibitor to yourself. Don’t worry about analyzing everything you’re saying or doing. We are our own worst critic and tend to make awkward situations out of something that otherwise wouldn’t be. And for the love of Pete, learn to laugh at yourself!
And finally,
6. Be brave.
The Princess Diaries stated it perfectly. “Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.” I have found that the times that I experience the most fearful moments is when I experience some of the most enriching moments. Don’t let fear hold you back from what is out there. Taking chances and putting yourself out there more often than not provides you with something better than you already had.
Now all of these nuggets of my personal experience may not be as or appealing to you as they are to me. I know my mistakes have made me who I am today, and I’m sure that I will make more. Nevertheless, if my embarrassing moments can save you from making your own, I'd feel much better about myself.
