It is engrained in us to aim for happiness every day. There was a time when I was struggling: happiness was far away from me and I mostly lived in a place of anxiety and fear. I began to feel guilty for being unhappy because there are so many people in the world who are suffering more than I could ever imagine. It wasn't until I allowed myself to feel sad that I then began to heal.
I realize just about everyone around me is aspiring to be happy. We bust our ass in school so that we may have our dream job-- that's when we'll find happiness. We search endlessly for the person we are meant to fall in love with-- this will finally bring us happiness. We drag our bodies to the gym and deprive ourselves of Nutella (ugh, I can almost smell the hazelnut perfection) in order to get into shape-- then happiness will fill our flawless bod. Suddenly a harsh reality hit me: we can land the dream job, find the love of our life, have the perfect body (and achieve whatever else our heart desires) but we will still want something more when we get there.
Happiness is an emotion just like anger, sadness, fear, hope, etc. We cannot feel just one emotion all of the time. Imagine if someone told you, "Okay, sad is in now. Just be sad every day and all of your dreams will come true." Sure, you could make yourself sad, but now and then something will make you feel good, scared or jealous. We cannot be sad constantly, just like we cannot be happy constantly. Life will hurl a curve ball and we will be knocked down, yet again, waiting for happiness to find us.
Every day that we fight for happiness is a day that we are setting ourselves up to lose. Many of us are waiting for life to present itself. For it to say, "Here you go! All of your hard work has paid off. Your life is finally beginning!" We wait for that moment and every day that we spend in anticipation is a day wasted. Right now your heart is beating in your chest. You are taking a breath in and out. Whether you are feeling excited, depressed or blissful-- you are alive. We need to shift our vision from striving for happiness to inviting in contentment.
Perhaps if we stop fighting our emotions (and rather accept them as they come) we may realize that right now we are whole, complete. Become curious as to when you are forcing a smile. Whatever emotion you are feeling, allow yourself to bask in it. Cry, laugh, yell-- honor yourself for being able to feel at all! Happiness 24/7 is unrealistic. But if you look a bit closer, you may find contentment is waiting just within your reach.
