Relationships can be a real drag. I should know. After constantly dating for almost four years I started to get confused as to why nothing was working out. Was it me or was it the guy? Or was it just simply the wrong timing? Just recently, after years of searching for an answer, I realized that the problem was that I was looking for a soulmate in all the wrong places: I was my own soulmate.
Sure, it is amazing to be dating someone who will call you beautiful and bring you flowers. It is also nice to have a date on Friday nights, but it is even more amazing to realize that you don’t need a man or woman to do those things for you — you can do them yourself!
You literally know everything about yourself. You know your favorite food and how you absolutely despise the texture of lasagna. You know your exact Starbucks order and you don’t judge yourself for binge-watching three seasons of Grey’s in one night (maybe that’s just me though). When you truly think about it, you are your perfect match.
There are so many reasons why it is important for women and men to understand this. The moment you realize that you have all that you need within yourself it becomes a lot easier for the right man/woman (the one who sees your worth) to become a part of your life. If you are not emotionally mature, in the way that you can appreciate and love being by yourself, then you are not ready to start focusing on another person. This is literally a proven Freudian phenomenon. Humans have stages of development and if you do not finish developing your own identity before you start developing an identity with another human then it is doomed from the start. Take the time to realize how amazing you are and the right man/woman will come your way when it is time.
When you do find your perfect match remember that they are an addition to your life: you do not need them. The only person you will ever really need in life is always going to be yourself. Remember that you always will have yourself to fall back on and it will become the most reassuring thought. People are not perfect and you will be disappointed if you expect your significant other to give you everything you want or need. Understand that you are a functioning human being so you have the capability of always making yourself happy- you do not need a boyfriend or girlfriend to find happiness. Everyone creates their own definition of happiness which means you have the highest chance, out of anyone, to actually make yourself happy.
Just remember that a boy or girl is not worth those tears. They may have brought you happiness for a short amount of time, but you have always been there for yourself and you always will be. There will always be someone else when it is the right time, but first enjoy being your own perfect soulmate.
