No matter where you are- school, work, or even unemployed; making new friends is something that can breed so much joy and add heaps of fun to your everyday life. Sometimes, it’s easy to get into a routine and forget that we have the power to expand our social circles, and what a blessing that is. The fact that we can connect with others, and we can relate on a deep intimate level with certain people is a gift to be celebrated, not avoided. So this year, I’m going to be more aware of how I can build natural connections, and support those around me through friendship. Here are 5 key tips to making friends with those already in your community.
1. Remember people’s names.
Studies show time and time again that this is one of the most important factors in building and fostering relationships. The most important aspect in a relationship is the two parties feeling valued. How can you do this? Remember their name. When you forget someone’s name, research shows that person does not feel valuable, but actually feels mildly unloved momentarily. So make up a nickname, or figure out what their name rhymes with, but do something to remember their name, it will make all the difference.
2. Don’t be afraid to talk to people.
This sounds obvious, but what I mean is: don’t be afraid to talk to people anywhere. Even in the weirdest circumstances, it is always okay to start chatting- in line at Starbucks, at the gym, on a plane. It is more than okay to strike up a conversation with a perfect stranger. Usually it makes the line go by a lot more quickly, or it makes the plane ride much more enjoyable. If you want to talk to someone, do it. You’d be surprised how great of people you’ll meet.
3. Get off your phone.
Yeah, yeah, I know you’ve heard this one before- but actually this time. Staring down at a screen just because you feel awkward is something we are all guilty of. However, this can limit connections with others majorly. Even if you’re by yourself and feel bored at the moment, maybe look for opportunities to connect with those around you, instead of on your screen.
4. Get involved in something you love.
There’s no better place to meet great people, than by doing something you love- you already have that in common. Join a flag football team, beach volleyball team, or take a ceramics class locally. Get involved with your community, and talk to people, and you will 100% come out with a new friend, or at least a familiar face.
5. Ask others about themselves.
I had this new year’s resolution one year to not talk about myself unless I was asked. To my surprise, a lot of people were happy talking about themselves the entire time. When I thought about it, most times we talk about ourselves without being asked. However, the bottom line is people want attention and love. So by asking about them, and really engaging, and taking genuine interest, you are fostering a great relationship because they know you really care. Also, I’ve found that a lot of people’s lives are a heck of a lot more interesting than mine, so that’s a plus. Take interest, engage, and see what happens.
