5 Things To Ask Yourself When Setting A New Year's Resolution

5 Things To Ask Yourself When Setting A New Year's Resolution

If you're choosing to commit to something, make sure it's worth it.
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With a new year comes new goals. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a better person, wanting to live a meaningful life and wanting to make positive changed, but there's a fine line between positive change and superficial self-destruction. When setting a New Year's Resolution, it's important to ask yourself these five questions.

1. Will this make me a better person?

Not "will this make me look better?" or "will this make other people think I'm better?" but will it truly make you a better person? Will it make your spirit softer? Your heart kinder? Will it help you connect with others and motivate you to make positive changes in your life daily?

2. How will this affect my life?

It's easy to set goals that motivate us to get things done and to finally check the things off your list that you've been putting off, but if you're deciding to make a change in your life, it's important to ask yourself how this change is going to impact your life in the long run. Will you view this goal next New Year's with peace, knowing you did something good?

3. How will this affect other people's lives?

If your resolution is so self-directed that you lose sight of those around you, it might be a good idea to rethink it. At the end of the day, the people around us and the relationships we have are the most important thing. If your number one goal this year isn't going to help someone else in some way, it's probably not the best goal.

4. Is this a superficial goal?

Why is your resolution what it is? Is it to gain the approval of another person? Is it because you think if you look different in some way you might be happier? The truth is, you won't. Unless you get to the real heart issues, nothing you do on the outside will cause any real change. What's the point of looking perfect if your life doesn't have enough meaning in it to show up for the people around you as you really are?

5. Does it really matter?

A year from now, when you look back on this goal, will you be happy with the changes you've made? Will you have enhanced your life and learned to find joy in the things around you? Will you have loved the people in your life the way you needed to love them? Were you the person you wanted to be?

A year is a long time. If you are choosing to commit to something, make sure it's worth it.

Cover Image Credit: pexels

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19 Struggles Only Girls With The 'Looks Thin In Clothes But Not In A Bikini' Body Type Will Understand

A resounding 'thank you' to whoever decided one-pieces were cool again.
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We grew up thinking the world was black and white. There's tall people and short people. There's old people and young people.

There's fat people and skinny people.

But as you get older, you realize there is a lot more in between those two ends of the spectrum than you ever thought possible. Especially when it comes to weight. And you do a lot more realizing if you're in an awkward position on that scale... Literally.

1. People always tell you to stop saying you are fat

Obviously, your friends SHOULD prevent you from talking negatively about yourself. And if you only saw you when you were fully dressed, you'd probably tell yourself to stop saying you're fat, too.

2. And are kind of surprised by your actual weight

You've definitely had friends who are shocked by the number on your scale because you can carry it pretty well when you are fully dressed.

3. Sometimes you feel like a catfish

Have you ever changed out of your super cute, flattering outfit and looked at yourself in the mirror and thought... Wow, am I lying to people?

4. But you know this is probably true for most people

When you're wearing clothes, typically the parts of a body that bring about insecurities (stomach, namely) are covered. No matter the body type, you realize most people are more comfortable in clothes than out of them.

5. Your confidence is often contingent on the month

November? Yep, won't need to be in shorts or a bikini for about 7-8 months. I am good to go.

February? I'll need to be in a bikini soon.. I could use some work.

6. You are thrilled by the one-piece bathing suit making a fashion come back

A resounding 'thank you' to whoever decided it was time to give one-pieces a try again. The stomachs of us in-between gals are appreciative.

7. Crop tops are 95% of the time not your top of choice

Yeah, okay, clothes are supposed to work for me and not against me.

8. You honestly don't understand jean sizes

I have fluctuated in weight a lot of my life, most recently losing 25lbs, and I still did not budge in jean sizes.

9. You wonder what other people think when they see you

Do other people see me as thin in clothing? Or fat in a bikini? What size am I perceived as?

10. Shopping is kind of a nightmare

Have you ever found about 27 items you liked, added the prices and thought, ah, it is going to be so tough to choose from all of these items? Only to go into the fitting room and realize only 2 of the items fit you well? Yep, me every single time I go to the store.

SEE ALSO: 7 Struggles Of Being The Girl Who Is "Not Skinny" But Also "Not Fat"

11. You're thankful that at least you've got boobs

You can kind of hide them in clothes, and then let them steal the show away from your tummy in a swimsuit.

12. You have a hard time setting weight-loss goals

You aren't really sure how overweight you are (if you are, at all) and you don't want to be at an unhealthy weight on either side of the spectrum.

13. Body positivity comes and goes

There are days, weeks or even months when you feel like the most beautiful person on the planet, and then something happens (old jeans don't fit, you try on a new bathing suit, etc.) and you convince yourself that all of that confidence was wrong and undeserved.

14. You always try on the biggest size first

Either this or you're in a weird limbo between the smallest plus sizes size and the biggest generic sizes size.

15. Half of you knows every body is a bikini body, and half of you is convinced that yours is not

You know that your body is worthy of wearing whatever you want to wear, but looking at yourself and seeing what society (and you) sometimes deem as unattractive can eat away at that knowledge.

16. But you also know self-love and confidence are key to beauty

Even if you have to fake it, you know that feeling confident is going to carry you pretty far.

17. Being in a bathing suit is a constant game of readjustment

Okay, I am sitting. Pull the bottoms up to cover as much as my stomach as possible and the back of the top down to cover any back rolls.

18. You've avoided the mirror after a shower before

You know that you are just going to lose all the comfort you felt in your body during the day when you see yourself, so sometimes it is best to just avoid it.

19. Ultimately, you know your beauty is not contingent on what you are wearing

The goal for everyone should be to get to a point where it doesn't matter if you're in a snowsuit, a bathing suit or a birthday suit... You can see your beauty no matter what and feel confident despite what you have on. It'll take time, but falling in love with the way you look is worth it.

Cover Image Credit: Sara Petty

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Rethinking Spring Cleaning

It's not all dust bunnies and silver polish.
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One morning as you leave your house you begin to feel something that you have not felt since mid-October. The air smells dewier— you didn’t even register this as possible. It’s not warm, but it’s not shrewdly freezing, and it’s when this cold-though-perhaps-cool air hits your skin that you realize: it’s spring.

Spring, ah, yes, the season before summer, after winter. In like a lion, out like a sauna. Memories of spring include a palette of pastel colors, the first crocus to break winter ground, yellow dust of tree pollen on windshields, and the plague of hay fever. Spring also has various event-centric connotations: spring flings, spring shopping, spring break, and most importantly within the frame of this article, spring cleaning.

The unpleasurable but eventually rewarding process of throwing away clutter and dusting what had gone undusted for the past year; spring cleaning is the literal 'Mother of All Rituals.' You nag yourself into decidedly throwing away that toaster oven, and then clean your actual oven to ensure that you really don’t need that toaster oven. It’s a give-and-take process, but usually, its conclusion leaves you with about two weeks of feeling new, the sort of rebirth that a secular spring has taken on for the masses, surprisingly.

But what if instead of cleaning out a closet or scrubbing a toilet, spring cleaning took on a completely different meaning this year? Something perhaps more directly connected to that which a half-watered-down bottle of Fabuloso can’t resolve: a cleansing of the SOUL. If you think I’m getting metaphysical with this, you would only be partially right.

A lot of the time the idea of mentally or physically cleansing brings to mind images of drinking kombucha on a silent retreat in Nepal. In reality, we don’t need to get all namaste to do some mental spring cleaning. Instead, we need to be able to recognize our most toxic, self-indulging habits and practices, and try to clear our mind of whatever allows us to perpetuate them.

Let me be less indirect: if something is bothering you or if someone is upsetting you without resolve, the best possible thing you can do for yourself is to take a step back, and say “goodbye.” Not allowing these issues to build also means that you’re not allowing dust to accumulate, anger to rise, distractions to perpetuate. Sweeping your hallways in frustration might be a great way to combat dirt, but won’t help to resolve the issues you’re having with a significant other.

We might feel cleaner after we color-coordinate your closet, but ultimately the problem is so often rooted not in your turquoise sweater having spent most of the year next to an orange flannel, but it's that you are taking control of something, anything, and that something functions as a distraction from real problems.

Dustbust every fuzzy bunny of lint that claims ownership of the space between your couch and your loveseat, and organize every pot and pan you own until you are stainless steel in the face. In the end, if springtime has not allowed you to be a bigger, better, more independent person, did it really happen? The weather hardly tells me it did, what with the gap shrinking between summer and winter, so it’s really up to you to give spring the sort of pseudo-secular rebirth it desires.

Cover Image Credit: Eduard Militaru / Unsplash

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