I sat down today, and thought about what I could write about this week. Fortunately, my friend gave me some sunflower seeds, and as I sat there eating them, I thought about baseball. I thought about how much the game has changed, and how there are things said constantly that do nothing but irk me, a baseball fan. So, with that being said, here are the five things, in no particular order, baseball fans hate.

5. Hearing that the game is too slow/boring

Now I know that baseball isn’t the most active sport out there, and I won’t try to defend it as such, but there’s something about the speed of the game that makes baseball special. You don’t hear people complaining about the speed of the game of golf, because that’s the way it’s always been played. Baseball is the same way. It’s strategic in its speed, and hs always been played at a slower pace. That in no way makes it bad. But in this society/world governed by an almost ADHD sort of speed in which information is thrown at us, the game of baseball lags behind. But I disagree that baseball should change its ways. Society should change its ways, not the game, so don’t try to implement rules to increase the speed of the game. Let the game flow naturally. And let’s try to concentrate on one thing for a couple of hours. Focusing. It’s like a new concept in this world.

4. [INSERT NAME HERE] is doing well, therefore [INSERT NAME HERE] must be juicing

Was there a PED problem? Yes. Were a bunch of big name players doing unbelievable things because of PEDs? Yes. Should we automatically assume that someone is juicing because he starts performing well? No. Nothing peeves me more than just assuming that someone is juicing because they’re doing well. Have we forgotten about a thing called working hard or being determined? Take for example Jake Arrieta. He starts performing well, and all of a sudden everyone starts asking if he’s using PEDs. I don’t know what country all of you live in, but here in America, I believe the phrase is innocent until proven guilty, not the other way around, so I’m going to side with Arrieta and laugh these people off as clowns. Just sit back and enjoy the ride instead of worrying whether the ride is going to crash or not, you’re just killing the vibe.

3. Hearing that baseball should be more high scoring

The people who say this irritate me the most. This is mostly because these are the same people that say baseball is too slow. Well, if there are more runs being scored and such, the game is going to take longer to finish, so it’s a very contradictory statement. And honestly, a close, low-scoring, pitcher’s duel is about as thrilling as a high scoring affair with lots of homeruns and extra base hits. So, I don’t know what prompted people to say this, but they need to back off.

2. People who like the newly implemented rules on sliding and trucking the catcher

I understand baseball for the most part isn’t a contact sport. I understand that sometimes injuries happen because of people sliding and trucking the catcher. I also understand that violence sells. It’s entertainment! People eat that stuff up. Look at hockey. Look at football. Hell, basketball in the 80’s and 90’s was much more competitive and entertaining than it is now. The same can be said with baseball. There’s nothing better than some guy blowing past his coach, who’s telling him to stop, and running home. He knows the ball is going to beat him to the plate, so he runs full speed into the catcher to try and pry the ball loose. Does it work? Not usually, but the times it does, it looks magnificent. It gets the fans going. You want to know why rivalries aren’t more prevalent in the MLB like they once were? It’s because of things like this. How can you have animosity towards someone who isn’t trying to harm one of your players. A rough baseball game makes for a more entertaining game, not a high-scoring one (see number 3).

1. People who think umpires should be replaced by robots to get calls correct

This statement is just blasphemous. Do umpires sometimes get calls wrong? Yes, they are only human. Have instant replay rules helped the game out? Absolutely. But all this does not mean we should take the umps out of the game. First of all, they get most calls right, and even a lot of very difficult calls. Second, unlike most other sporting officials, umpires actually take the time to apologize if they see that they missed a call. Why? Because they care about the game. Jim Joyce literally has an ESPN Article written about how his bad call that cost Armando Galarraga a perfect game still haunts him. Also, having human umpires adds a bit of strategy to the game. All players have to adapt to how the ump is calling the strike zone. And I don’t know about you, but I hate seeing that little strike zone on the bottom right of every TV broadcast now. It’s there just to torment fans and get them all riled up about the way an umpire is calling the game. I think it needs to go away, so the umps can just do their job, and not get heckled.