For those of you who know me in real life, you know that I am a "no BS" kinda girl. I don't hesitate to stop involving myself with people and situations that I believe will do more harm than good in the long run. I don't give things a second thought if they don't deserve one, but I haven't always been like that.
No, actually, I can clearly remember a time when I put many people and issues before my own well-being. Long story short, that all lead me to the cynic I am today (okay I'm not that cynical, but I'm getting closer and closer every second). So here's a small list of things I've decided to stop caring about.
1. How many friends I have
Yes! There was a time when I cared about this believe it or not! The early years of high school when popularity determined one's existential value, that's when everyone cared about the amount of friends they had. And I'll tell you what, I was friends with some people who really ended up hurting me in the end.
The definition of friend in that part of my life was just someone you spend time with. I didn't know that a real friend was someone who was supposed to care and support for you, someone who was supposed to understand and respect your own individual needs.
Sure, I upheld that part of the definition fine on my own, but those people I considered to be friends, they just walked all over me. They took my humility and used it until I was all out, then walked away the minute I became inconvenient. That was when I stopped worrying about the number of friends I have, and more about the quality of the people I consider to be my friends. I don't have many friends and I don't care.
2. What My Ex is Up To
This is more of a recent development, as I've only been single for a year and a half now. All of you who have been in a relationship know how hard it is to let it all go in the end. I spent months desperately trying to hold onto him, trying to keep up with all of his happenings (and to see what other girls he suddenly found interest in).
I realize now how much time I wasted doing that. Why should I care? We were over and done with so long ago, I should have just moved on. I regret it now, but I'm looking forward to my life of not caring about whatever he does. I just don't care, he can do whatever he wants, date whoever he wants, and I won't bat an eyelash.
3. My Grades
I talked about this in a different article so I'll keep it brief. Basically, I've spent my entire academic career trying to maintain a 4.0 GPA. Trying so hard to the point where my own personal well being was being ignored just so I could see that A on my transcript.Now, this is not to say that I don't care about grades entirely, I just don't care as much. I'm going to take care of myself before my grades and who knows, I might just loosen up a bit and have a little fun. Crazy, right?4. What Other People Think of Me
This one has been a work in progress. We are taught my media and by our peers growing up to care what other people think of you. We are shown that the more people like you, the better off you will be in life. Now that's just silly. Here's the secret: not everyone will always like you. Everyone has haters, and if you spend your whole life trying to please them, you're going to get nowhere. You're going to be stuck in a sick cycle of self-loathing.
I know, I've spent a lot of time trying to make sure everyone likes me. Trying to fit into the mold everyone has built for me; transforming my personality to be exactly who people want me to be in that moment. It sucks.
And why should I care what people think of me? As long as I am working to be the best person I can be and as long as I am happy, that's all that should matter to me, not what other people believe I should be like. I can be whoever I want to be and if no one likes me then oh well. In the end, all we have is ourselves, and if you don't like yourself then you're gonna have a hard time. Work on liking yourself, not pleasing others. It's a waste of time.
