We live in a world where in todays modern society the assertive and charismatic personalities are favored over the silent, solitary individuals. Introverts are known for being cat people than dog people and for making up excuses for when we don't want to go to a party. We're often seen as shy or even antisocial and to take it a step further, people even lable us as snobby. When I was around the ages four or five I would spend the weekend with my grandparents and cousins. I specifically remember a certain video my grandparents have of my cousins and I playing, well at least they were playing. As for me? I was in the corner staring out of the window. Alone. Pondering about God knows what. You would think that a kid my age would be begging to go outside or playing dress up, but since I can remeber I've always enjoyed being alone. For someone who has been an introvert all of her life, there are certain aspects about me that outgoing people fail to understand so I'm here to set the record straight and let some things be known.
1. We're not all shy
Something that we introverts always get is that we're very quiet or are always in the zone. It's not because we don't want to talk to anyone, but rather we're thinking about what's going on around us and trying to take it all in. With that being said, one of the top misconceptions about introverts is that we're shy. Yes, some of us can be shy, but that's not the case for most such as myself. Ghandi once said, "Speak only if it improves upon the silence." This not only sums up my life but my thinking process as well. It'snot that we're remarkably shy, it's that we select our words carefully. We're just thinking and constantly processing and analyzing your facial expressions and tone of voice.
2. We're great friends
If you're close friends with an introvert it's safe to say that you're very special to them, so consider yourself lucky. We are very cautious with whom we converse and socialize with or even trust. The party scene may not be our thing, but we are down for a deep intellectual conversation about our passions and long term goals in life. I will say this, it does take us longer to build a friendship with people because we have to feel you out and see what kind of person you are. We're not going to open up to just anyone but when we do we're more than happy to have an intellectual conversation and talk about our passions and long term goals in life. If we give you a piece of us it's a huge deal to us and we need to be able to trust you with it. The best thing about being friends with an introvert is that we're great listeners. Just because we aren't participating in the conversation doesn't mean that we aren't engaged or aware of what's being said. Sometimes a solid nod and a few inputs here and there are all that's needed at the time.
3. We need our space
Like I mentioned before, introverts are great friends but we're even better at being alone. Our bubble space is a must, like we'll die if someone tries to invade it. My typical Saturday night consits of a Netflix marathon of Grey's Anatomy and The Office (for the millionth time) with a nice snack. If we don't spend enough time alone we will become very annoyed with everyone and everything. Down time to some may seem unproductive, but for an introvert it's the complete opposite. Staying inside and keeping away from the exhausting world is fun and safe. Cuddling on the couch with a good book and fuzzy blanket is like a little kid getting a sticker after getting a shot at the doctors office. Being alone is so peaceful and soothing that I choose to be alone over hanging out with my friends sometimes, sorry not sorry. There will be nights where we just need to stay in and recharge. Sorry I can't make it to your cousin's brother's best friends ex-girlfriends house party, my cat died. We just need a little R&R. So just chill and give us a break.
4. We like to keep a small circle
When we say that we're going to hang out with a group of friends we usually mean about one to three people. Being that we're humans we still need to feel connected with other people, just not with as many people. In a smaller setting is when we're able to be ourselves (almost) and shine bright. It's more comforting for us to be around a few of our closests friends than being engulfed by a sea of faces that we either don't know or would rather not be around at the moment. When there's alot of faces in the room that usually means that there will be hours of small talk with different people. Don't get it twisted, we still want to be heard even if we don't want to talk very much and in front of very many people.
We are not anything less than extroverts, we just think and do things differently. If there's any advice I can give to my fellow introverts it would have to be: it's okay to be the way you are and don't feel ashamed about being different. You're not invisible and there's something deep down within us that is greater than any sterotype or opinons of others cann throw our way. Take your time to process things and go at your own pace.
