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Politics and Activism

37 Fictional Characters, Inanimate Objects, And Animals I'd Vote For Over Clinton Or Trump

We need them now more than ever.

Zoey Guarino

Oct 22, 2016

Storytellers of New Jersey

143

37 Fictional Characters, Inanimate Objects, And Animals I'd Vote For Over Clinton Or Trump

Bustle

This election has officially gotten out of control. I yearn for the days when Ted Cruz was mocked for supposedly being the Zodiac Killer...the days when Bernie ate fried chicken with Killer Mike... the days when Ben Carson was.... well, Ben Carson. The glory days, before death threats for social media posts-- before notions of an impending nuclear holocaust, were tangible. Ah, how I pine for those days. With all of this, I've decided that this week we should all take a step back from reality. Let's laugh a little. So here is a list of all of the fictional characters, inanimate objects, and animals I'd rather vote for on November 8th.

1. Mona Lisa Saperstein

Even though "she's the wo-o-orst.. She's the worst person in the world".

2. Carl

3. Al Bundy

4. Samantha James, Bitch

5. Caroline

6. Zoltan

7. Toilet Dweller from Spice World

8. Hot Ham Water

9. Jean-Ralphio Saperstein

10. Hand Banana

11. The McPoyles

12. Jesus Quintana

13. The Guys at Animal Control

14. Antonio Banderas Love Doll

15. The Mooninites

Ignignokt and Err would make brilliant leaders......

16. Steve the Roomate, aka Skull Fucker

17. Brandon

18. Artemis

19. My Boyfriend's Bulldog, Travis

20. Nosferatu

21. Tommy Wiseau

...This is actually a real person.

22. Satan (South Park)

23. Doug Wilson

'A way more lovable Trump'...

24. Ferguson (the cat)

JUST LOOK AT HIM

25. Pepper

26. Matheson

27. Norman Bates

28. Shorty

29. Gob Bluth

30. Kenny Powers

31. Damian

32. Leo

33. Raleigh St. Clair

34. Pabst Blue Ribbon

'Making America Great Again Est 1844'...

Really, I'd vote beer in general-- but this is the most 'Merican.

35. Sandor Clegane (the Hound)

36. Fat Amy

37. Montez Walker

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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37 Fictional Characters, Inanimate Objects, And Animals I'd Vote For Over Clinton Or Trump

We need them now more than ever.

1. Mona Lisa Saperstein

2. Carl

3. Al Bundy

5. Caroline

6. Zoltan

7. Toilet Dweller from Spice World

8. Hot Ham Water

9. Jean-Ralphio Saperstein

10. Hand Banana

11. The McPoyles

12. Jesus Quintana

13. The Guys at Animal Control

14. Antonio Banderas Love Doll

15. The Mooninites

16. Steve the Roomate, aka Skull Fucker

17. Brandon

18. Artemis

19. My Boyfriend's Bulldog, Travis

20. Nosferatu

21. Tommy Wiseau

22. Satan (South Park)

23. Doug Wilson

24. Ferguson (the cat)

25. Pepper

26. Matheson

27. Norman Bates

28. Shorty

29. Gob Bluth

30. Kenny Powers

31. Damian

32. Leo

33. Raleigh St. Clair

34. Pabst Blue Ribbon

35. Sandor Clegane (the Hound)

36. Fat Amy

37. Montez Walker

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

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