Am I qualified to give you advice? No. Am I going to do it anyway? Yes. Besides the common, know how to check your oil and change your tire, know how to balance a checkbook and do your taxes, there are other personal things that need to be achieved during adulthood. And whereas some people forget to mention those things, I am here to tell you the three that I find most important.
1. Be independent before being codependent.
You need to know that you can survive and thrive on your own. Most of us young adults jump into adulthood thinking we need search for someone to spend the rest of our lives with so early on. Instead of doing that, we need to learn to be completely independent first.
Go to the grocery store on your own, live on your own, be financially stable on your own. Cultivate your career and work on self-love. Latching onto someone before knowing that you can do those things on your own can sometimes make you feel like you need to be dependent on them in order to succeed in your life's endeavors. Get to know yourself before trying to get to know yourself with someone else.
2. Go places.
Whether it's near or far, leave. Gain a differing perspective on life. Experience different cultures. Find a new coffee shop in the next town over. Standing in one place your whole life won't get you very far, take a leap of faith and leave.
Don't let the fear of failure keep you from going. You can always go back to where you came from, but at least you can say that you left. Home will always be waiting for you with open arms, and who knows, maybe you'll discover another place to call home.
3. Enjoy the small things that people remember about you.
Grand gestures will always be memorable, but it's the small things that show you how much you mean to someone. In some friendships or relationships, it's not always common to be told how much someone values your presence in their life, but there are always ways to tell how much they care. If they remember your coffee order, or several of your coffee orders.
If they remember what you said you're doing today when you told them two weeks ago. If they remember how much you hate mushrooms and your utter dislike for seafood. And if they remember the little quirks to your personality. At the end of the day, it's more likely that you appreciate someone's thoughtfulness that goes into little everyday things more often than the grand gesture they pursued a month ago.
