25 Thoughts Every Non-Runner Has On The Treadmill | The Odyssey Online
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25 Thoughts Every Non-Runner Has On The Treadmill

For everyone who hates the treadmill, like me.

25 Thoughts Every Non-Runner Has On The Treadmill

If you're anything like me, the treadmill is more like an enemy than a workout companion. Every day that I walk into the gym, I cringe wondering if today will be the day that I conquer my fear of the treadmill. I'm either running four miles at only 5.0 mph or one mile at 7.4 mph. Just haven't been able to find that happy medium yet, maybe one day.

1. Okay, maybe if I stretch on here, I'll look like I know what I'm doing.

2. Wow, that girl beside me is going fast. Must be a college athlete.

3. Why is 4 m.p.h. labeled as a jog on here? This is my "run away from danger" pace.

4. Okay, I'll set my speed as a solid 5.5 and see how long I last.

*Starts music*

5. I love this song. But it makes me want to go out tonight.

6. What am I going to wear if I go out tonight?

7. Hopefully this run will make me look hotter and skinnier tonight.

7. I bet I've definitely gone half a mile by now.

8. Oh, still only at two tenths of a mile.

9. Why is that girl beside me still running so fast?

10. These shorts are riding up, and they're super uncomfortable.

11. Can the guy behind me tell they're riding up?

12. I bet if I had cuter running shoes, this would be easier.

13. I'm going to go buy some later.

14. Okay, definitely at half a mile now.

15. Oh, still only four tenths of a mile.

16. Do my arms look weird?

17. I wonder if people can tell by the way I'm running that I'm not a runner?

18. Okay, finally reached half a mile, six minutes in.

19. Here comes the football team. Better bump this speed up.

*Increases to 8.0*

20. Now everyone thinks I'm really in shape, because I look like I'm running so fast.

21. This is really fast.

22. That girl beside me is still running.

23. I'm gonna take it back to a walk for a minute.

24. I've definitely probably run far enough for today.

25. I think I'll just get on the elliptical, I'll try the treadmill again tomorrow.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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