I am always the one to sit around and think of things I can do to help myself become a better me. I think of the things that I may need help with or things I need to work on. No one is perfect and I like to work on my weaknesses so they can turn around and become strengths.
So I sat down over the course of three days and thought about what I wanted to do that will benefit me. I thought about many people in this process and then the thing I wanted to do hit me. "I need to learn how to forgive"
Sounds pretty straightforward right? But it is NOT that simple at all. I say forgiveness is one of those "easier said than done" actions. It is not easy to forgive someone and many people believe they do forgive when they actually don't. If you think you forgave someone but the thought, mention, and presence of that person effects your mood in a negative way, then you have not forgave. Of course we will ALWAYS remember what people have done to us but we have to learn to forgive rather than forget. Not forgiving those who hurt us only hurts us more, not them! So after realizing this I wanted to change how I felt about many issues.
I did not know how to forgive or whether or not it was a process. So I went on google in search for some novels. I found the greatest book, Forgiveness: 21 Days to Forgive Everyone for Everything by Iyanla Vanzant. She is an inspirational speaker that had her own show on Oprah Winfrey Network called Fix My Life. I always would watch Iyanla on tv and wish she could come help my family. So knowing of the work she does and now finding a book she wrote on forgiveness was great. I was more so eager to read the book because she wrote it, and she is good at what she does. So if she thought I can learn forgiveness in 21 days I was all for it.
I ordered the book from Amazon and it came the next two days. The book comes with a CD that has meditation and things you have to follow according to the book. I started the first two days and I found myself drifting away from the book. Each day is a new thing that you have to do. Or someone else that you have to forgive and that can open a lot of old wounds. I enjoy that the first person you forgive is yourself, that is healing and it makes you think of reasons you should forgive yourself. I had to tell myself that this is something I wanted to do so the people that hurt me would not have power over me anymore.
Forgiveness can help in many ways that you would not even think about. I am now on Day 15 which is "I Forgive My Brother/ Sister. This chapter will be a little tough for me being that me and my older sister are not as close as I would want us to be. This chapter will allow me forgive her and change the way I see the relationship.
This process is not easy and there are days I just want to close the book and never pick it up again. Reopening old wounds could be hard and you may open new wounds that you never thought you had. You may cry and you may feel frustrated but you have to know in the end you will have a clearer mind, body, soul and heart. I will be starting Day 16 soon, are you ready to start Your Day 1 of Forgiveness?
