Earlier this week I turned 20. So, by the time you're reading this I'm probably 20 and give-or-take 5 days old. You wouldn't think that makes much of a difference, but it does. When you're 19 everyone still treats you like a teenager, because, well, you are. Then, overnight, you're suddenly no longer a teenager, and people start to look at you differently. 20 is when you're expected to start acting like an adult. Excuses like, "I was so young and stupid when I did that," don't work as well. You start to feel bad taking money from your parents for all the late-night wings you don't need to order because you should have your own job. It hits you that almost half of your college career is over and that you need to start figuring out what you want to do with your life after. So yeah, everything changes. As stressful as change can be though, often times good advice is all we need to help calm our nerves. And despite the fact that I only just turned 20, here are 20 of the things that I think are the most important to remember as you begin another decade of your life.
1. It's okay to make mistakes. We all do.
Forgive yourself. Other people will make your life hard enough without you being tough on yourself.
2. But admit when you're wrong.
I get that some of us have this need to always be right, even when we know the other person has a point. Let go of that. The fighting is unnecessary and will only leave you in a worse mood.
3. You're the only one who can make yourself happy.
No amount of friends or a hot boyfriend will make you happy if you can't love yourself. Stop looking at your flaws and accept yourself for how amazing you are.
4. Not everyone has to like you.
If everyone liked everyone else the world would be a much better place. Unfortunately, that's not the case. Don't let it bother you if someone doesn't like you.
5. It gets better.
We all have days when we think it's the end of the world. It's not. Just keep reminding yourself of how much you've already overcome.
6. It's not that serious.
You're probably overthinking it. No, you're definitely overthinking it.
7. Don't rush things.
If it's worth having, it'll take time to get there. And if it's not meant to be then you'll realize that too.
8. Accept criticism.
If someone is taking the time to tell you what you're doing wrong, it means one of two things. Either they care about you and want to help you improve. Or they don't care, and you should improve just to prove them wrong.
9. Someone else has it worse.
Remember that the next time you complain about how the barista messed up your Starbucks order.
10. Talk less, listen more.
You'll learn a lot and it'll show people that you care.
11. Take time for yourself.
You don't always have to say "yes" to people. It's okay to want to be on your own and to do what you need to do for yourself. If people are offended by this, they're not really your friends.
12. If you feel like crying, cry.
Sometimes we all need a good stress cry. That's just how life works. Trust me, you'll feel better after.
13. Don't take that last shot.
If you have to think twice, don't do it. You'll hate yourself for it in the morning.
14. Stand up for what you believe in.
Don't change your views to match what you think others want you to feel. Stay true to what you believe in. It'll take you far.
15. Make plans.
Think about what you want to do with your life and how you want to get there. It'll be a lot easier to do it now than to wish you had later on.
16. Try something new.
You know how you've always been talking about how you want to go skydiving or travel to a different country? Stop talking about it and do it.
17. Take advantage of the fact that you're young.
Go out on a Friday night even when you have an exam the next week. One bad grade on one test isn't going to determine the rest of your life. Plus, you won't be able to have these experiences 10 years from now.
18. Spend time with your little siblings.
Okay, so maybe they're not so little anymore. You can tell you're not as close anymore as they start to branch out and become their own people. Make an effort to spend a weekend with them instead of going out with friends, because they miss you as much as you miss them.
19. Listen to your parents.
Believe it or not, they know what they're talking about. And 99.5% of the time they're going to be right and you're going to be wrong. Accept it and learn from them. Sure, you're 20, but they'll always be your parents.
20. If you want the cookie, eat the cookie.
Just do it.
