If, you're anything like me (as in wholly obsessed with coffee beans, completely infatuated with Yale University, and irrevocably head-over-heels with paperback books), then, you must be religiously following the lives of the Gilmore girls through your television set or computer screen. As an honorary member of not only the cooky Stars Hollow community, but also of the wise-cracking Gilmore clan, I have found solace in using their lines as mantras for how I live my life. And, with Rory Gilmore off to college in the second half of the show, it makes perfect sense to instill the Gilmore's "slight" addiction to Luke's coffee, their trained diet for junk food, and their snappy references of pop culture into my university living, right?
Without, further deterrence, here's a little insight into the top twenty quotations from the beloved series that define my college life as of now - from boy talk and eating habits to mental breakdowns and study dates. And, don't forget: take all these with a grain of salt and a cup of regular coffee.
1. "People don’t realize it, but it takes years of training to eat the way we do."
This is exactly what my best friend and I say to each other as we pile our plates with curly fries, pizza squares, and watermelon slices at the dining hall.
2. "I’ve got about the next two and a half hours planned, and then there’s just darkness and possibly some dragons."
If yo've have ever pulled an all-nighter to write an English paper due the next day at 10:00 AM (on the dot, not to mention), then, you know you're in a world full of hurt - filled with Cheeto dust, passed time, and ultimate regret.
3. "I cannot do this alone. I need my mommy and I don’t care who knows it."
Yes, tell the truth. Everyone in the history of university-going students has always begged their mother to come save them from the sharpened claws of college assignments. They've all pled for those home-cooked meals and warm hugs.
4. "God! You’re like a pop-up book from hell."
This is literally every person who can never avoid that one girl who chews with her mouth open, does yoga day and night, asks people to take pictures of her "besties" with a Polaroid camera, and talks only and highly about herself. (We've all been there, to be honest.)
5. "Get back in your pajamas, go to bed, eat nothing but gallons of ice cream and tons of pizza."
This was the peptalk my future roommate used to always give me when I spent most of my nights writing my English essays and breaking my back over mounds of books to search for quotations.
6. "I need caffeine. Whatever form you’ve got. I haven’t had any all day. I’ll drink it, shoot it, eat it, snort it, whatever form it’s in. Gimme!"
Every coffee lover has, at least once, harassed a Starbucks barista when their order is taking too long for comfort. And, props to those coffee fiends who drop to their knees to beg their barista to slide a bag of coffee beans on the down-low for quick sustenance while they finish making their grande, lightly iced, sugar-free, vanilla latte with soy milk and a drop of almond milk with whipped cream on the side.
7. "Who cares if I’m pretty if I fail my finals?"
Every person's belief on the night before Finals Week commences. I mean, really? Who could ever put beauty before grades?
8. "Nothing excites me before 11:00."
Ah, yes. Typical college student who gets up at 4:53 PM each day of the weekend when weekday classes finish up. And, if it's Sunday, the day of rest, they'll sleep all the way from Saturday night to Monday morning.
9. "It’s Friday night. We should be out partying with the homies."
We should be out, rolling with the homies, to be exact. But, no, we're in our cozy pajamas playing Scrabble and watching "Grey's Anatomy" when we could be at the Row, dancing our socks off.
10. "I don’t like Mondays, but unfortunately they come around eventually."
This is pretty self-explanatory, in my honest opinion.
11. "If you’re going to throw your life away, he’d better have a motorcycle."
The lecture my best friend throws me when I'm pondering over taking the English class that conflicts with my boo's sports practice or going to my boo's sport practice rather than English class.
12. "College is breaking my spirit."
My spirit was broken even before I started attending college. High school ruined it.
13. "I can’t believe we get to sit around and talk about books and get graded."
...and, I can't believe we get to sit around and talk about books and get graded and pay heaping amounts of tuition money, so our president can build pointy things like a crazed mom at Target.
14. "What are you gonna do without a college degree? Drive a forklift?"
This is literally my roommate's exact words when I tell her I can't go through another intensive semester of reading English books written by dead authors and would prefer to live the life of a broke actress taking on Hollywood.
15. "A little nervous breakdown can really work wonders for a girl."
Been there, done that. Check. And, for those of you wondering, I broke down over an English class that made me memorize thousands of quotations for the final exam, only to be met with ten random, but easy ones that I could have probably guessed with a blindfold on.
16. "I live in two worlds, one is a world of books."
My apartment is a miniature version of Barnes and Noble; I could make the Titanic out of those mountains of texts I keep under my bed and inside my desk.
17. "Oh man, I can’t believe this! I finally got asked out on a date and I missed it?"
This is what happens when college students are so stressed: they miss out on a milestone they'll probably never get back. But, who cares? Are you really gonna fall for the frat bro who wears sweaty tanks and ripped Chubbies?
18. "Violent pencil-tossing usually signals a need for pie."
Once again, this is a sign that I hate college with every fiber of my being, and, if worse comes to worse and I need to get violent, pie will always solve my problems. As long as it's served with a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top.
19. "Well, I study, then study, then after a little study break, I study."
There's a life outside of studying? WHAT?!
20. "You have so many years of screw-ups ahead of you."
Here's to being a reckless, broke, and rad college student - from now until forever! A toast to regrets and mistakes... *clinks IKEA wine glasses*
You see, these "Gilmore Girls" quotes really do hit the bullseye when it comes to college life - and all that's in-between. Maybe now, you'll finally have an excuse to binge-watch the series tonight when procrastinating for your midterm paper or senior project. Because, as if you'd ever forget, this show is more than a lifestyle - it's a religion. So, grab your coffee mugs, Lane's music selection, and last night's take-out and prepare to be Gilmored.