On October 14th, I turned 18 years old. I look back on the past year and I can’t believe that I’m already back here, celebrating another birthday again. I’m finding that my 17th year was a very significant one, with so many “last time” experiences and moving on to college. All in all, it was a year full of lessons that I’ll carry with me for the rest of my life.
1. Don't worry about the future too much.
With high school coming to a close and the rest of my life just at bay, it was hard to focus on the now and not worry about the future. However, I realized that I wouldn’t be able to enjoy my last year in high school if I kept stressing about the future so much. By allowing myself to just revel in the present, my senior year was about a million times more enjoyable.
2. Kindness should be relentless.
It was always an endeavor of mine to be as kind of a person I could be. However, it is difficult to be a nice person on your bad days, or when someone doesn’t really deserve it. But I learned that kindness should never waver. Be nice to show you’re the bigger person. Don’t let your negative feelings affect how you treat others. After all, this world could use a bit of extra kindness.
3. Not meeting all of your goals doesn’t make you unsuccessful.
I can be extremely hard on myself sometimes. When I didn’t meet a huge goal of mine, such as hitting a certain time for one of my cross-country races, I was extremely upset. However, I realized that life isn’t meant to be a giant bucket list where your successes are determined by a check mark. Success exhibits itself in many ways, such as how happy you are or if you still inspire people, regardless of whether or not you meet certain goals.
4. Never ignore your feelings.
Blocking out your feelings just because you don't know how to deal with them will never yield a satisfactory result, especially if you try to do it for months on end. Feelings end up revealing themselves whether you like it or not, and if you repress them, they will just come crashing down on you. If anything, I wish I had learned this a lot sooner.
5. Love manifests itself in different ways.
The epitome of love is not and will never be a stereotypical "romance." The love you have for your friends and family is so powerful that it can be kind of overwhelming sometimes. It’s a feeling that will motivate you to become a better person, and to be completely selfless on many occasions.
6. Take a lot of photos and videos.
It can feel kind of awkward to turn on your camera during seemingly insignificant moments. But I have learned that later on everyone will be happy to see that some of the best memories were captured by your camera. So take tons of photos. Record those moments with your loved ones. I have realized that you’ll most definitely not regret it later on.
7. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
I had a lot on my plate senior year, and I was convinced that everyone believed I was half-assing everything or not dedicating myself enough to all of my commitments. But I realized that I am my own biggest critic, and that I wasn’t disappointing anybody after all.
8. Don’t hold your tongue.
Although it is wise to pick your battles, I also learned that my voice deserved to be heard. I learned to stand up for what I believed in, even if others disagreed with me.
9. Compassion is your passion.
I had always been an empathetic person, but I had never realized what a gift that was. I realized that compassion is one of the best things a person could have, because without it our world would look a whole lot dimmer. Compassion inspired me to figure out my path after high school, because I had enthusiasm for helping others.
10. Home is not a physical place.
A house is made of wood, plaster, bricks, and metal. A home is not. I learned that home is the people you surround yourself with. There are some people who you look at and you just feel a wave of security and comfort that a house doesn’t always provide.
11. You don’t need to do what everyone else is doing to be happy.
I learned to be my own person by feeling validated for even when I wasn't doing what everyone else was. I had my own group of friends, and I knew what really made me happy. That’s what truly matters.
12. It’s okay to be heartbroken.
Heartbreak is extremely powerful, and I learned that for the first time. I felt extremely ashamed of how upset I still was, even when there were a million other reasons for me to happy. I realized it’s okay to feel that way. It’s okay to feel sad. Everyone goes through it, and those type of feelings are not invalid, no matter how trivial it may seem to others.
13. It’s okay to miss your friends.
With starting college, I felt so vulnerable being without my friends. I thought if I voiced these feelings, I would be perceived as weak. But I learned that it’s okay for your heart to ache in that way, because everyone in college goes through it. In the end, it will make seeing your friends again after a long time that much sweeter.
14. You can never write too much, so make time for it.
I went through waves of intense feelings throughout my 17th year. Although I loved writing, it was hard to find time for it because of how busy I always was. But I learned that writing is a saving grace, and that it was always relieving to write out even just a few sentences after a long day.
15. High School doesn’t end all at once.
Maybe it does for some people, but I never had that single moment where I was like, “This is it,” even at graduation. The end was a process that occurred throughout the months after high school, and I’m thankful it was. I don’t know if I could have handled all of those feelings crashing down at once.
16. It’s not your job to please people.
Although I do aim to be a kind person, I also know I have to make my happiness a priority. This is especially true when picking a college. Your parents might not like it, but hey, it’s not their future in the end.
17. You still have a lot of years, don’t worry.
I thought that it was the end of my “youthful years” when I left high school and turned 18. But I learned that I still have a lot of years left of being young, even if I do take on more adult responsibilities. There will be a lot of trial and error, but I know I have so much to look forward to. Here’s to another year.
