1. No one cares about what brand of clothes you wear.
It just seems so trivial to judge someone based on their article of clothing. Your friends won’t care where you shop or what kind of clothes you buy, and those who do care about those type of things are not really your friends. Those are people who struggle with a concept called “identity,” which is an important thing for you to have. Never forsake your love for sparkles and glitter while it’s still appropriate (even though sparkles and glitter are always appropriate). Also, everyone shudders while remembering bermuda shorts and Juicy Couture tracksuits... so don't stress out.
2. This will not be the first time you get your heart broken, and you will survive.
I wish I could tell you that this is the only heartache you’ll ever experience. But I can’t. You will continue to get your heart broken and break the hearts of others in a vicious cycle until you find the one you’re destined to spend your life with. Spoiler alert: 18-year-old me has not yet reached that stage. And that’s okay. Getting your heart broken is a period of growth and rebirth; you learn a lot about who you are as a person when you’re at your lowest. You also learn who your friends really are. Pay attention to those who cry with you, but also who laugh and smile with you. As you grow and mature, your values and interests will change, as well as the values and interests you seek in others. I'm no doctor, but eating a pint of Ben & Jerry’s is the best cure-all remedy.
3. Be kind.
I know it’s easy to make fun and point fingers but I’m asking you not to. You really don’t know what type of life the other person is living unless you step in their shoes. Be kind to those you can’t understand, or are different from you, or even those who are not nice in their own lives. To paraphrase your girl TayTay Swift, being kind is a wonderful legacy to leave behind. She's preaching! Of course this is an extreme example, but there are so many stories circling out there about people not ending their own lives because a stranger smiled at them. Who says you can't be that one person to make a difference?
4. STUDY.
I know school at this point is so easy. I hate to break it to you sister, but it will not always be this simple. At one point in your life, you will have crack out the books and study. In college, you are expected to be studying for a week before a big test, and you won’t be the only one in the library on a Thursday night. It is so crucial to form important study habits early, so you’re not struggling with your course loads later on. As boring as studying is, it’s a necessary evil. So stop complaining and start memorizing vocabulary words -- I promise it'll be useful in the long run.
5. Have as much fun as possible.
I know you are faced with a lot of pressures right now. Everything in your life has to be "right," and your reputation means everything. You’re finally a teenager, and you’re learning how to handle all of the ups and downs that comes with it. However, most people don’t look back on these years and say, “Wow, that was the best time of my life! I would give anything to go back to middle school!!!” So don’t sweat the small stuff. Yes, work hard, but don’t forget to make memories. Go to that Jonas Brothers concert! Your 18-year-old self trying to survive in an A.J. (After Jonas) world will immensely thank you. Camp out under the stars and a make wish that the boy from your English class will finally notice you (he never did). Laugh out loud and often. Enjoy having virtually no responsibility while you can!
6. Don’t be an ***hole to your parents.
I know you feel that all parents are annoying and overbearing and want to ruin your life, and that your best friend's parents let her do everything and it’s not fair! Here’s a little rude awakening for you, be thankful that your parents care enough about you to not let you do half of the crazy ideas you come up with. So maybe this year you finally had your first sleepover. Great! You really weren’t missing anything! And not being able to date? You really weren’t missing anything! Not being able to go to movies after 10 p.m.? Again, you really weren’t missing anything! Your parents, like you, are trying the best that they can, and are human beings capable of making mistakes. One day you will wish your mom was around to yell at you to clean your room or your dad was walking around the house singing off tune.
7. Don’t be in a rush to grow up.
All you are wishing right now is to be 16 years old with a license, or 18 years old with a high school diploma. I know you think once the clock hits midnight on your 16th birthday, you’re going to transform into a beautiful goddess whom every girl will automatically want to befriend and every guy will fall in love with. You also think you’re going to meet the guy of your dreams freshman year, date him forever and marry him after college. Here’s another rude awakening for you. Yes, you got your license at 16, but you completely totaled your car two weeks later. Yes, you got the high school diploma, but high school was anything but enjoyable. And yes, you had the high school romance, but it was anything but picturesque. In a nutshell, 13-year-old you grew six inches, matured (in more ways than one) and became 18-year-old you, without a Princess Diaries makeover. Believe it or not, 18-year-old you is pretty happy with the way you turned out. So don’t be in such a rush to grow up. It’ll be here before you know it.
8. Bangs are a bad idea. Actually, just don’t ever cut your hair.
Pretty self-explanatory. I know Selena Gomez can rock them but you can’t, no matter how hard you try. Sorry, kid. It only makes you even look more awkward than before.
9. People change.
The group of girls that you eat lunch with every day might one day decide they don’t want to eat lunch with you anymore. It sucks, but it’s life; and it won’t be the last time people change on you. Sometimes you’ll be the person to change. You and others will end friendships and relationships because you’re not the same person you were when you entered. Don’t freak out. Make peace with what happened and move on. Please remember that there’s no real blame on anyone, it’s just the way things are supposed to be.
10. Don’t be afraid to try new things.
Going along with the “be yourself, people won’t judge you” tangent, don’t worry about your peers making fun of you for your interests. It’s okay that you think organized sports are dumb! You will be so happy you started pursuing theatre and tried (key word here) dance! You are going to meet a bunch of new people with similar interests as you. Eventually all of the kids in school will think you’re famous because you do productions in New York City. We both know you didn’t have the heart to tell them that that wasn’t the case. Have fun with that one!
11. Read more.
Yes, 18-year-old you wishes you read "Harry Potter" when it came out instead of being 10 years late to the party!!! You will never have this much free time again. Instead of terrorizing your best friend’s poor neighbors, pick up a book! Reading is a great form of escape from your confusing and stressful pre-pubescent world. Transport yourself to Alagaësia or Hawk Harbor, Maine or even in your own backyard.
12. Eat healthy.
You don't have to tell me about red velvet cupcakes being your weakness, and how you’d rather have ice cream and waffles for dinner over broccoli any day. As you get older, your metabolism slows down and you can no longer “run off” a large milkshake from Carvel. Besides that, learning about nutrition and eating right will help your body stay strong and healthy for a long time. Plus the healthier you eat, the better you feel all around. I’m not saying never eat anything unhealthy, but learn about the concept of moderation. Eating Ben & Jerry’s after 9:00 p.m. one night is fine, but several nights in a row probably isn’t one of your best ideas.
13. You are perfect just the way you are.
You don’t need to lose weight or dye your hair or change your laugh or change anything about yourself for that matter. The people who you see on the cover of magazines don’t even look they way they appear. People with cute laughs are enigmas. It’s okay if you don't have the most toned body, or if you have a weird laugh, or if you have an unhealthy obsession with pulling practical jokes. Author Bernard M. Baruch once said, "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." In short, there are people out there who will like you for who you are.
So stay true to yourself, you crazy child. Thirteen is a wild ride, but one you will look back on with fondness, amusement, disbelief and disgust. If I could leave you with one final parting word of advice it would be this: stay as far away from Aeropostale as you possibly can. For the love of God, please.
