13 Things People With Anxiety Need You To Understand

Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up. -Proverbs 12:25

1. We can't help it.

We wish we could help it, but we just can't. We have tried a million things to make it go away and we pretend it isn't there sometimes; but it is. Please understand that we are trying our best to make our disorder a minor kink in our lives, but sometimes it isn't.

2. Sometimes we don't understand why we feel this way.

We try, we try harder, and we try our very hardest to understand what our triggers are. We might know some things to stay away from, but we won't be able to be proactive about everything in our lives. We don't understand why we get anxious sometimes, and we don't expect you to always understand either.

3. We might not always know how you can help.

I could tell you a few things to help me when my mind starts to race, but they won't always help. Sometimes I need one thing, but the next time that thing might not help. Bear with us, we want you to help us but we know that we need to help ourselves first.

4. Sometimes we might need to be alone.

Please, please, please respect that sometimes we need some space. It is normal for people with anxiety to want a little alone time when things that to get crazy. This might happen when it's just two of us, it could be at a social event, or it could even be when we are with our closest friends. If we need to be alone, please let us.

5. Sometimes we might need your company.

On the other hand, we might need you to stay with us. If we don't want to be alone at that particular moment, we might ask you to keep us company. Sometimes that means leaving a social event, or changing plans. I'm sorry if I ruin your plans, but sometimes I need you.

6. If we don't talk about it, don't pry it out of us.

We will talk if we want to talk, but that isn't always what we need. We appreciate that you want to find out why we feel this way, but sometimes we might need to talk about something different or not talk at all.

7. Every, single one of us are different.

I have had a million different forms of anxiety, and I have seen others have a million more. We are all different, and we cannot be treated or tended to the same way as another person with anxiety. We are unique in our disorders, and we have different triggers and needs.

8. We might cry uncontrollably.

I'm sorry about this one. I know it's probably odd to see someone go from laughing to crying in a span of 5 seconds, but sometimes it happens. We are not always bipolar or depressed, sometimes a trigger hits us at the weirdest times. Forgive us for this, and listen to us if we ask for assistance.

9. Please do not yell at us.

I cannot stress this one enough. Please, please, please do not yell at me. You are asking for me to shut down and to go into my shell. I do not know how to respond, and the uncontrollable crying may, or may not, occur because of this. Please for the love of all things holy, refrain from yelling at us.

10. We will probably take everything personally.

I try to be rational when I react to things, but sometimes I can't help but blame myself. We don't try to feel attacked, but it is likely to happen. We are hard on ourselves, and being positive is one of the hardest tasks that we try to pursue. I hope you understand that if you tell me something that I need to fix, I will put every ounce of energy I have into fixing it.

11. We will assume the worst at all times.

No text back? Dead. Won't answer your phone? Dead. Not home at your usual time? Dead. Dark Clouds? We are all dead. We can't help but overthink and assume. We have the biggest hearts, but we are still trying to figure out how to use them.

12. Some weeks we won't sleep at all, other weeks we will sleep all day, every day.

I have gone weeks with an hour or two of sleep a night. I have also gone weeks with 12 hours of sleep a night and a daily nap. These are my two extremes, but they are highly likely. If I get 8 hours of sleep and I don't take a nap, I am on top of the world! Respect my sleep schedule, and please do not try to change it.

13. We feel guilty for our disorder.

We know that it's hard for us to deal with, but we also know that you are having to cope with us. We can't control our minds, but it has to be frustrating to not understand how to help. Listen when we talk, do your best to keep us positive, and know that we are trying our best to be normal. We don't want to add stress to your life, but we know that we do.