I wasn’t blessed with a sister in the traditional sense of the word, but I was fortunate enough to grow up spending a lot of time with my twin cousins who are four years younger than I am. The three of us have grown so close that we now consider each other sisters. I learned from a young age that, for better or worse, these two pairs of eyes would be watching me and learning from my successes and my mistakes. This list is a compilation of important things I have learned so far and want them to keep in mind (but in many ways they are wiser than I am, so who knows, they may know a lot of them already!).

1. Being the girl who is good to people is always more important than being the smartest, funniest or prettiest girl.

My favorite people in this world are the ones who have, for whatever blessed reason, chosen to invest in me and in others they care about. Always love on others and soon, that’s what you will become known for. And believe me, that is the kind of reputation you want.

2. Try to never go on a first date that only involves seeing a movie.

Go to a place where you can look your date in the eye and actually converse with them and get to know them. There will be plenty of time later to sit in a dark theater staring at a screen watching yet another superhero flick or cheesy romantic comedy.

3. As often as you can, tell others what you love about them.

It makes them feel good about themselves and better yet, it shows them that you pay enough attention to them to know what they’re great at or what makes them unique.

4. Never be afraid to speak your mind, but also know when to remain quiet.

Sometimes you’ll find that sharing your opinion will further a conversation and add meaning to it, and sometimes you’ll find that sharing your opinion will only lead to an unnecessary argument or misunderstanding. Learn to know the difference between these two situations, and learn to act accordingly.

5. There isn’t much that a phone call to or a visit with Memaw can’t fix.

For real. I just spent twenty minutes on the phone with her and I feel better and more confident now than I did when I woke up this morning. Not only will conversations with your grandparents make their day, but those talks will also bless your soul.

6. Try not to drink soda.

It makes your skin break out and your teeth rot, plus it messes with your digestive system. Do yourself a favor and drink more water than anything else.

7. Any guy who isn’t “sure” about you isn’t worth another second of your time.

There is absolutely no need to work to prove to someone that you’re worthy of them. If they don’t already know that you are, odds are they’ll never know it. Their loss.

8. Hug your mom and dad as much as you can.

Do I really need to explain that one?

9. A little compassion goes a long way.

Spend two bucks to buy a bottle of water and a granola bar for a homeless person. Offer to help your struggling classmate study. Thank a veteran for their service. Offer to cook dinner for your mom when you know she’s had a long day. It’s often the little things that have the greatest impact.

10. Experiences will always mean more than possessions do.

My dad (your fave uncle) always says, “It is better to do than to have.” I grew up living by this mantra, and I know you have too, but always keep it in your mind when you are earning your own living and get to choose what to do with it.

11. Family is irreplaceable.

Always, always choose to attend a family gathering over hanging out with a boy you like or spending time with friends you can see any other time. You won’t regret it. Trust me.

12. No matter what happens or what situation you find yourself in, you can always come to me.

And I hope that you do. I will always be here, fangirling over your every accomplishment and praying for the very best for you. I look forward to having sleepovers with you long after we’re at the age when it’s socially acceptable to be having them. You are my favorites, and I love you…to the moon and back.