I know that I'm not perfect. No one is. But this wasn't something that I learned years ago. About a year or two ago, I began to love myself for who I was. It wasn't a concept I could grasp when I was becoming a teen. My pre-teen and early teen years were the most stressful for me; I wasn't the smartest, nor was I the skinniest. My insecurity levels were so bad that I could never be positive or have happy thoughts. I was always so negative.
But over the years, I figured out how to get over my insecurity and began to love me for me. It didn't happen overnight or after a couple days, it took a while. Here are some tips that I used to help me.
1. Not to be cliche, but firstly, stop comparing yourself to others!
This was something that I had to stop doing because it wasn't something that helped me. Comparing myself to others just made me feel more insecure and didn't really make me optimistic. This is just a no-no.
2. Don't ever pay attention to what media has to say about how females (or males!) have to look.
The media will always exaggerate what people have to look like. There really isn't a "right way" to how anyone should look. Beauty has no rules; you're still pretty if you have stretch marks or don't wear makeup and you're still handsome if you don't have muscles or if you have a lisp. Remember that your life does not reflect on if you're good looking or not, so go and do what makes you happy.
3. Post little notes of inspiration or cute little sayings around the house, especially on mirrors and rooms where you spend a lot of time in.
Having these little things around will help you feel more secure with yourself and give you a boost of confidence. These notes can be about having a good day to being motivated to go for a run.
4. Never take negative/rude comments from anyone.
"You're too fat," "You'll never finish school with those grades" and "Get rid of your arm hair, it's disgusting. No one will ever want you" are some comments I've heard people make towards others. Never take these to heart. Listening to negativity will just bring you down even more and won't let you see yourself on who you really are. You'll just avoid doing what you love, avoid looking in the mirror or just distance yourself from others.
5. Listen to take constructive criticism in a positive way.
Let's face it, nobody likes to be criticized. But sometimes, you just have to listen to what other people have to say and focus on how to better yourself. In order to love yourself, you have to start new habits and a positive mentality. But don't mix up constructive criticism with negative comments. Constructive criticism is used to improve something through a kindly manner while negative comments are just mean and insulting.
6. Let the people who love you help you!
It doesn't matter if they're your second cousin or family friend, just let someone help you. Whoever the person you choose will always be there! Your family and friends are there for a reason, so confide in them and tell them your troubles. They'll always be there to support and help you.
7. Accept who you are, you're perfect just the way you are.
You were born the way you are. Nothing is ever going to change that.
8. Stop the idea of perfectionism.
Everyone has flaws and imperfections. Nobody can ever be perfect. Since being perfect is such an unattainable goal, it causes some people to destroy themselves trying to reach it.
9. Let go of all the negative beliefs you've created about yourself.
It can be hard to let go of the negative thoughts you have about yourself, but with some will power, you can. Constantly focusing on these negative thoughts is a bad habit to have.
10. Do things that make you feel good and confident.
It could be dancing, taking pictures or doing yoga. It can be anything that makes you feel happy with yourself (as long as it isn't dangerous!) Find out whatever it is and stick with it.
11. Surround yourself with positivity.
If you're always complaining about how everything is going to go wrong or if you are doubting yourself, stop and take a breather. There's always going to be a silver lining. Don't worry too much and just let it go. Let go of the past, focus on the future and make the best out of everything.
Loving yourself is not easy and it will not happen overnight, but taking small steps everyday into taking care of yourself will get you there eventually.
