In previous years, I have attempted to watch the Super Bowl. I have valiantly sat in the living room with my dad and siblings, trying to comprehend what is going on. Usually, I turned to the book I brought along as a backup plan.
Let's face it, football is not my thing. This year, I finally gave up and just did my homework in the other room and hung out with my mom. But I thought, to celebrate the end of an era, I'd show you what it looks like when I try to watch football.
1. "Which color are we rooting for?"
2. "No, I am not planning on reading during the game!"
3. "Those colors clearly clash. I'm uncomfortable."
4. "You mean to tell me grown men get enjoyment out of smashing their heads together for a bit of pigskin?"
5. "How many other ways could I be spending my time right now?"
6. "Define a touchdown."
7. "I think I understand now...wait. Never mind."
8. (looks up from book as everyone cheers)
9. "Yes, I'm sure the fact that he gets to kick a ball through the little toothpicky things at the end of the field makes sense, but why?"
10. "They make HOW much money for this?"
11. "You'd seriously rather do this than anything else?"
12. "Yeah, I'm totally rooting for this team."
13. "Oh, it's over? ....Darn."
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