There are two types of people that inhabit this earth: the introverted and the extroverted. Plenty of people have an understanding of what extroverts are like, but there are so many common misconceptions about introverts. There is so much more than meets the eye with these people. Introverts have a lot more going on in their lives than people would think. I, as a fellow introvert, am often frustrated by the classifications that we are put under. In this article, a lot of the stereotypes will be disproven and explained. Here is an inside look at what introverts would like to tell the world about what they are thinking to help be understood.
1. I like conversation but I enjoy listening more.
When standing in a group of people that are conversing, there’s always that one person who listens more than they contribute verbally. It’s not that they don’t like to talk. They can carry on any normal conversation if need be but, more times than not, they listen to what the extroverted people of the group have to say. They take in their surroundings with sight and sound not because they are shy, but because it’s what they enjoy. They take pleasure in receiving social energy rather than giving it out. When hanging out in a social setting, I find myself letting others lead the conversation unless I am with a group of people that I know really well. I enjoy hearing about other peoples' lives more than talking about my own.
2. I know what I want to say, I just can't put it into words.
Ever have a thought in your head that you want to tell someone about but just can’t seem to verbalize it for them to hear? Unfortunately, this is a frequent problem that I struggle with. I’ll be thinking about a story or an event that happened that I want to share with a friend but as soon as it’s time to say it, I freeze. Some part of my brain disconnects from my mouth and all words just disappear. Suddenly, there is an awkward pause because I am struggling to find the words that I just had prepared. If the words don't come back, I typically just laugh it off and move on.
3. No, not all of us read books all of the time.
A common misconception about introverts is that they are the people who sit in a corner and read books all day. While this may be true for some introverts, it is certainly not true for all of them. Being introverted means that we enjoy doing things in a solitary setting rather than a social setting. This can range anywhere from watching movies to painting canvases. Yes, reading books fall into a solitary category but isn't the only introverted activity out there. For me, listening to music or watching tv is just as satisfying and I can still do it on my own.
4. For every hour of social interaction, I need an hour of alone time.
I love hanging with my friends and going out, but I need alone time after that to recover. Extroverted people can go hours, even days with constant social interaction. Introverted people need alone time in-between social outings to regroup mentally before they can interact with others again. I tend to go out with people for a couple of hours, then spend the rest of the day or evening by myself to recharge. Alone time is very important for us because social interaction can be very taxing.
5. If I see you in public, I'm not avoiding you, I'm just shy.
My mom always gets onto me about acknowledging people that I know when we are out in public. She says that people will think that I am stuck up if I don't say "hi." Many introverts have been labeled stuck up for this same exact reason. This frustrates me so much because I'm not trying to give off that impression. I panic in those situations because it is a lot of pressure to be the first one to say something. There is also the worst possible outcome from saying "hi" first, which is that they don't acknowledge you back. If this happens, then you just spent social energy and embarrassed yourself. So, next time you see someone, if they don't greet you first, they might be waiting for you to make the first move.
6. I can still be outgoing even though I am an introvert.
No one is completely an introvert or completely an extrovert. They are either an extrovert with introverted tendencies or an introvert with extroverted tendencies. I am the latter of the two. I can be very social at times and put myself out there but I still have more introvert in me. I am an acting major which calls for me to be outgoing in situations but I still prefer my alone time. Many people are the same way; not all introverts are completely socially awkward all the time. They are fully capable of being social, they just feel more comfortable not.
7. I'm not lazy.
I am often labelled "lazy" due to my preference of alone time. This label isn't accurate at all. I am often more productive on my own than with others. What people don't understand is that introverts don't spend all day laying in bed hiding from the rest of the world. They get just as much stuff done by themselves, if not more because they don't have as many distractions.
8. I am very observant, sometimes overly observant.
I am what society likes to call a "people watcher." I enjoy seeing what the rest of the world is like from a distance. Plenty of introverts prefer to observe an interaction without interrupting. You'd be amazed at how much one can see when they aren't the one's interacting in the situation. Introverts also tend to remember details about an observation that they had more than extroverts because they are used to focusing more on receiving than giving.
9. I know when something is wrong, almost immediately.
My best friend and I love to joke about the fact that we can tell almost immediately when something is wrong with either one of us because of how much we pay attention to each other in social situations. This means that we notice every little reaction that occurs even when others don't. This goes hand-in-hand with the whole observation skill that introverts have. We notice the emotions that most don't, because we focus more on how a situation is being received rather than what it is about. This allows us to detect more than just a surface level perception of someone.
10. I can have very good conversations.
People often make the assumption that since introverts listen more, they can't have interesting or meaningful conversations. This idea could not be more wrong. My best friend Ty and I have some of the best talks about life and society that I have ever had. Extroverts can have many short, meaningless conversations for hours and be completely content. Introverts desire more than the average small talk. If you get the chance, sit down with an introvert and drum up a conversation. I guarantee that it will be interesting.
11. Most of my friends are extroverts and it works.
Being in the drama department, I am surrounded by extroverts but most of my extroverted friends are people I have met through other classes and sorority. The dynamic between an introvert and an extrovert works a lot better than one might think. The give and take in social interaction blend well, since the introvert listens intently while the extrovert provides the talking. In a sense, opposites attract and work very well. If you're an introvert, don't be afraid to have extroverted friends. They are pretty fun to be around.
