A lot of people would like to think that they are philosophers. Most would be wrong. As I am about to finish up my undergrad with a degree in philosophy, here are a couple of truths I would like to share with those "wannabes" who think they already know what they're talking about. (Hint: How do you know that you know? Took a whole class on that one.)
1. The Matrix is philosophical...some of the time.
For many people, the Matrix acts as their only experience of philosophy. In many ways, it seems to have pioneered the pseudo-intellectual discussions you often see on TV when someone is drunk or high. If you think that that scene in the second movie with all the televisions and Neo standing in the middle of a room talking to a well-dressed program counts as philosophy, you are wrong, and bought into a lot of fast talking but ultimately useless drivel. If, however, you realized the Matrix brought up an important question about whether we can know that we are living in the real world, then you might be ready to be a philosopher after all.
2. I have hands! Thanks, G.E. Moore!
Speaking of whether you know you are in the real world–for centuries, philosophers debated whether we can know anything about the external world. Skeptics said no. Thankfully, G.E. Moore came along and pointed out he has hands. The point being, one can't know that they know something about the external world. You can't have certainty. But knowledge doesn't require certainty, and he is surer that he has hands than anything else, so he must know about the outside world.
3. There is a West versus East debate in philosophy.
There are two forms of philosophy, analytic and continental. Analytic are the people who make you rephrase every sentence you say because it wasn't "precise enough." Continental are the people who say things you can't understand and may not even understand what they are saying themselves.
4. Objects are weird.
Let's just say we don't really know what makes an individual object an individual object. All of the explanations go against everything we believe to be true, like for instance, the idea that a table is an individual object? Yes, some philosophers would say that you are wrong.
5. Time is even weirder.
Ever wondered how fast time travels? Well, thanks to my philosophy classes, I have. And no there is no satisfactory answer.
6. Sometimes scientists get in way over their heads.
Many scientists say that philosophy is no longer needed. What they don't realize is that that is a philosophical statement. Seriously, scientists, leave the philosophy to those of us who will soon be unemployed.
7. Big words are hard...and said a lot.
Unrestricted mereological summation. Yes, it is a thing.
8. Your favorite philosopher is probably wrong.
I promise that you will run into a philosopher you think must be absolutely right about everything. Until you find five undeniable refutations of his theories.
9. Intuitions matter.
In philosophy, we recognize that your intuitions act as your starting point for doing philosophy. It isn't an exact science—technically, it isn't a science at all. Philosophical arguments can sometimes show you your intuition is wrong, but many times, at the end of the day, two solutions will be present. Neither of these will feel completely satisfactory, and you will be forced to choose based on your intuition.
10. Thought experiments can be messed up.
These are meant to help clarify a philosophical problem. Many times they include aliens, mad scientists and even "seed people." But other times, they can get plain gruesome. One thought experiment explains that you barely see your friend explode from stepping on a land mine, yet unbeknownst to you they were actually killed by a sniper round. Lord only knows what this is trying to prove, but apparently it was quite successful.
11. The more you learn, the less you know.
My philosophy classes have taught me that every time I think I know how the world works, I'm not only wrong, but apparently I have been disproven for thousands of years. In the face of so many philosophical challenges that seem too complicated to understand, I usually find myself becoming humbled and inadequate for the challenge. If you ever meet someone who is arrogant and says they like philosophy, it probably means they are a philosopher of the second Matrix movie rather than the first.
