9 Things You Know If Your School's Football Team Sucks | The Odyssey Online
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9 Things You Know If Your School's Football Team Sucks

Let's face it, school spirit sucks and you're jealous of all the awesome pep-rallies you could have.

Payton Isner
May 22, 2017
Furman University
933
9 Things You Know If Your School's Football Team Sucks
Wikimedia Commons

Football is the centerpiece of school spirit and a school's community outreach. However, I come from both a high school and a college that unfortunately sucks at football.

1. Your school's spirit doesn't exist.

We're all secretly jealous of the awesome pep-rallies seen on TV.

2. The marching band is socially acceptable.

Get down and dance, because everyone's leaving after halftime anyways.

3. Homecoming is a lackluster affair.

What's the fun in a dance when your team just lost 42-3?

4. The football coach still thinks he's cool.

And just as Remus Lupin shows Professor Snape in "A Very Potter Musical", everyone knows he's secretly to blame for your school's athletic failure.

5. You secretly want to transfer.

Pack the boxes, we're moving anywhere but here.

6. What's Signing Day?

Let's be honest, they're just fourth string at the state college down the street.

7. No one knows who the team captain is.

Wait, the football team has a captain?! Why?

8. The team blames you for not showing up and supporting them.


Let's be honest: even when I did show up, you still weren't good.

9. Every year is magically "the year."

Sorry, the team wasn't sprinkled with magic, you're still going to suck.

So alas, every year is the same, and your school still sucks. So what can you do? Well, go support the teams that don't suck, they need your actual support! Plus, start the hunt for the magical dust to make your football team better. Trust me, it's the only way.

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