If you are anything like me, you shudder at the mention of the word dentist. Here are a few reasons why...

1. You haven't been to the dentist since you've been away at college and worry that you may have developed a rare strain of mouth disease.

You're just hoping to make it out with the majority of your teeth intact.

2. They get all worked up if you're two minutes late, but then you somehow have time to read all fifty magazines in the waiting room before they call you back.

You don't know how long you've been waiting, you just know you are going to need dentures when it's finally your turn.

3. It takes them about an hour to adjust your seat to the perfect position.

If you haven't experienced motion sickness before, well now you have.

4. They get a little too close for comfort.

Are you cleaning my teeth or peering into my soul?

5. They floss like your gums contain some hidden treasure that they must discover.

I'm pretty sure the dentists have a running competition on who can produce the most blood via flossing.

6. They expect you to carry on a full conversation with your mouth wide open, and if you try to answer like a normal human and move your mouth, they get mad.

Inside every dentist is an aspiring therapist.

7. They feel the need to catch up with grandma in the middle of a procedure.

You just take your time. I'll just lay here and hope I don't choke to death on my own saliva.

8. They tell you to lay off the sweets unless you want to experience severe tooth decay

But you have to treat yoself for surviving a trip to the dentist.

9. They fill your mouth with as much fluoride as humanly possible and then decide it's a good time to go for a leisurely stroll.

If I swallow this stuff I might die, but if I don't swallow my throat is going to have a seizure.

10. They remind you for the millionth time that you should have got braces when you were seven, and since you didn't your teeth don't look right.

Thanks for that confidence boost doc.

11. They stopped giving you lollypops now that you're an "adult".

If you make it through with minimal tears, you deserve a reward.