Ah, election year.
A time when the American people can be heard.
A time in which our finest, sharpest, and most upright citizens have the privilege to vie for the title of "Leader of the Free World."
A time of peaceful, intellectual, and thought-provoking debate.
A time...
Am I convincing anyone? No? That's okay. I wasn't even convincing myself, to be honest. The 2016 election year has been exciting, to say the least. Kind of like a roller coaster! An unfinished roller coaster...anyone else getting the same feeling you get when someone brings up religion at a family event or before eating gas station sushi? Like, "I don't know what's about to happen, but there's no way it'll be good"? This feeling of unrest is rising in the American people- and I think I can fix it.
Introducing our next and best candidate for presidency in 2016: Louis CK.
Now granted, he's a dark horse. But even putting aside his sagacious wit and brutal honesty, the comedian, writer, and producer has been hugely successful and has a gift for making really funny and adept observations about the world we live in. I believe this is the man America needs. Without further ado, here are 11 reasons Louis CK should be our next president.
1. He Understands Life.
Life is not fair. And he's not going to lie to you and pretend he can make it that way. After all, aren't we sick of being lied to?
2. He recognizes the need for sensitivity (I'm looking at you, Trump).
A universal truth. You'd think people in the spotlight would have a few more apologies in their vocabulary. Or, even better, they'd have the tact not to hurt people in the first place.
3. He doesn't deny the existence of inequality and privilege.
4. He has the right idea about gay marriage.
We all need a pep talk every now and then. A "Nothing is as bad as it seems" talk. Who does it better than Louis? This kick-in-the-pants attitude will keep the American people moving and focused!
6. He is super at addressing women's issues.
Preach it, Louis. Having someone who cares about women's issues and isn't afraid to directly address them would be pretty sweet if you ask me.
7. He puts our lives into perspective and keeps us humble.
Raise your hand if you suffer from white people problems. Now raise your hand if a dose of reality once in a while wouldn't be the worst thing for you. *raises and twice*
8. He reminds us that all the obstacles in our way make us stronger people.
What a motivator! "The very real problems we are facing have now become tools that we can use to grow and strengthen our nation! God bless you, and God bless The United States of America!"
-President Louis CK, probably
9. He prompts hard discussions.
How many candidates in the past have glazed over our toughest subjects to preserve their image and avoid having to honestly face a problem? Not this guy. He's got the honesty of Trump, minus, you know, the whole insanity thing.
10. He even has a platform about immigrants!
Not a bad way to look at it if you ask me. He is a superstar at addressing these hot-button issues.
And finally...
11. I just have a feeling he would handle the stress of the job really well.
Let's be honest, we've all had days like this.
So there you go. He's honest, he's fair, and he's one hilarious and insightful dude. We could all use a daily dose of Louis. My question to you is this: why isn't this man running our great country?!
Just so everyone knows...there is a write-in portion of the ballot. Yep, that's L-O-U-I-S. Yes, there's an 's'. No 'ie'. Got it? OK. I'll just leave this here.
You go, Louis. We Support you. #louisforpresident #ck2016 #golouisgo
