Dabbin’ Through the Snow Christmas Sweater
Okay first of all this sweatshirt isn’t even remotely clever, it’s just jumping off the cultural trend that is dabbing. Secondly, fads like these fade fast, in fact I’m pretty sure we’ve already moved on to the Mannequin Challenge. So the lifespan for the relevance of this shirt is less than a month, at which point its doomed to a life of hopping between thrift stores until someone has the mercy to burn it.
Matching “Hubs” and “Wifey” coffee mugs
When matching wedding bands aren’t enough to advertise your marriage to the world, try these matching cringey coffee mugs.
Personalized Nursing Water Bottle Tag
Is this such a problem in the nursing community that it necessitates these to exist? Water bottle thieves that frequent hospitals?
Hostess with the Mostess Underwear
I’m against any sort of cliche text on anything ever but this is just odd, never mind that the typography is somewhat… pubic.
Baby Foot Cookie Cutter
This looks nothing like a baby foot. This item should be renamed Realistic Poop Shape Cookie Cutter.
Daughter to Dad Text Poster
This is the most uncomfortable and creepy sounding poster I have ever read. In one sentence this sign reinforces two outdated gender roles: (1) thinking girls spend every day of their life pining for their future husband, and (2) that girls have to be submissive to their fathers no matter how old they become.
Hillbilly Weener Kleaner
...It’s a bar of soap with a hole cut into it. A bar of soap...with a hole cut into it.
Why anyone on Earth would pay for prewritten naughty messages packaged in a fragile glass lightbulb for their significant other is honestly shocking. OR, you have the option of paying for blank strips of paper to write the messages yourself, so basically buy a lightbulb for $13.00!
No social media platform is worth hanging a framed print glorifying it in your home, no matter how many photos of bubble tea they have. If you have this hung up in your home you probably also have crocheted beer coozies and a LiveLoveLaugh photo frame in your living room.
Felt Coffee Coozy
This looks like a strip of rotting human flesh, and I can imagine it would start smelling like moldy coffee farts within ten minutes of use.
Breaking Bad Suggestive T-Shirt
Finally, a T-Shirt in honor of the Destiny's Child classic, "Sulfuray my Nitrogename."