I’m sure you’ve figured out what you’re giving up for Lent. Whatever you’ve chosen, it gets awkward when everyone asks you what you’re sacrificing, especially when you want to grow in humility. To avoid the occasion of pride, here are 10 things you can tell them and the reasons why you would give these things up.
1. Household Commitments
A spin on the classic "I'm giving up church for Lent" but this isn't a mortal sin! Win-win.
2. Turning Left
Some unfortunate souls are born with the inability to turn left. In order to better understand their suffering, give up your bi-directional privilege.
3. Your Human Rights
Some unfortunate souls don’t have human rights. Ask an accountability partner to chain you in their room and deprive you of food and water!
4. Being White
Take Ash Wednesday a step further! (If you find this joke too offensive, pretend I said something like "give up Starbucks and leggings as pants" or some other white stereotype.)
5. Hope in Humanity
The world is just too messed up. Between terrorism, midterms, and rampant secularism, there’s really no reason to keep going. Give up trying, and go live alone in a cave somewhere.
6. Laughter
The best part about Lent is the sorrow. Embrace the sorrow by refusing to laugh at ANYTHING. To increase temptation, place banana peels around campus.
7. Your Relationship
Did the girl you meet at orientation gain the freshman 15? Here’s your out! Break up with her under the guise of "focusing on your relationship with Jesus." (Which, let's be honest, is not impossible to do while dating. Like, is it only possible to focus on one relationship at a time? Seriously, Frannies.)
9. The Funk
We want the funk. Give up the funk. We want the funk. Gotta have that funk.
10. Jokes About Caf Food
Fine, the food is sub-par, we get it. But first of all, it’s better than anything you could make and second, your jokes aren’t very funny. I am the only one who is funny.
