Ten Reminders About Who I Am

Ten Reminders About Who I Am

For those days when I seem to forget.
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I have always struggled with accepting myself and I know that a lot of people feel the same way. I am proud of who I am and I think everyone should love themselves no matter what. I am enough.

  1. You are strong, sometimes too strong. Perhaps all that strength comes from giving pieces of yourself to everyone only to have to stitch it all back together. It’s ok to be weak and need help. It’s ok to cry too.
  2. You are tone deaf, you can’t clap to a beat or sing. Be open about it and don’t get so defensive. So what, you can’t hear the beat but you can fake it with the best of them. Lord knows you sound awful when you try to sing but you slay every song in the car. You love it so keep doing it.
  3. You wear your heart on your sleeve, this is good and bad. You try to hide your emotions but to no avail. Your emotions leave you vulnerable and that scares you, it lets you get hurt.
  4. You are a book nerd, it’s your escape. You’re the girl that can quote almost every line from every Harry Potter book. Nerd is a compliment to you. A reader lives a thousand lives before they die and you are dead set on not missing a minute of any of them.
  5. You are dedicated, you can achieve anything. It’s never a matter of if you can do it, it is how and when you will. Don’t let fear hold you back.
  6. You are an old soul, embrace it. You get told “You are 60 years old” based on some of the music you love. That is so unique and don’t let anyone change that. So scream Lynyrd Skynyrd and Journey at the top of your lungs and embrace your 60 year old taste in music.
  7. You are a competitor, in everything you do. From the lacrosse field to a card game, you like to be good at everything. Remember that it’s ok, you are not perfect and you don’t have to be. Don’t lose yourself in the competition of life.
  8. You are humble, says the girl writing about herself. You’ve never thought of yourself as better than or more deserving than other people. Humility is one of the most important things in your life and you take pride in that.
  9. You love wholeheartedly, be cautious of that. Don’t ever be afraid to love, but don’t give your love away for free. Know your worth and wait for the person that respects you. In todays world people move so very fast, slow down and let yourself love and lose.
  10. You are loved, even in your worst moments. Your parents love you even when you repeatedly forget to take the trash out (sorry mom)… Your friends love you even when they hate you. Never let someone make believe you are not loved or worth being loved.

This piece is about self love and knowing your strengths and weaknesses. It’s OK to be flawed, God made us this way and we have to accept that. I am not perfect and I don't need to be.

Cover Image Credit: Barb Piepmeyer

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Everything You Will Miss If You Commit Suicide

The world needs you.
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You won’t see the sunrise or have your favorite breakfast in the morning.

Instead, your family will mourn the sunrise because it means another day without you.

You will never stay up late talking to your friends or have a bonfire on a summer night.

You won’t laugh until you cry again, or dance around and be silly.

You won’t go on another adventure. You won't drive around under the moonlight and stars.

They’ll miss you. They’ll cry.

You won’t fight with your siblings only to make up minutes later and laugh about it.

You won’t get to interrogate your sister's fiancé when the time comes.

You won’t be there to wipe away your mother’s tears when she finds out that you’re gone.

You won’t be able to hug the ones that love you while they’re waiting to wake up from the nightmare that had become their reality.

You won’t be at your grandparents funeral, speaking about the good things they did in their life.

Instead, they will be at yours.

You won’t find your purpose in life, the love of your life, get married or raise a family.

You won’t celebrate another Christmas, Easter or birthday.

You won’t turn another year older.

You will never see the places you’ve always dreamed of seeing.

You will not allow yourself the opportunity to get help.

This will be the last sunset you see.

You’ll never see the sky change from a bright blue to purples, pinks, oranges and yellows meshing together over the landscape again.

If the light has left your eyes and all you see is the darkness, know that it can get better. Let yourself get better.

This is what you will miss if you leave the world today.

This is who will care about you when you are gone.

You can change lives. But I hope it’s not at the expense of yours.

We care. People care.

Don’t let today be the end.

You don’t have to live forever sad. You can be happy. It’s not wrong to ask for help.

Thank you for staying. Thank you for fighting.

Suicide is a real problem that no one wants to talk about. I’m sure you’re no different. But we need to talk about it. There is no difference between being suicidal and committing suicide. If someone tells you they want to kill themselves, do not think they won’t do it. Do not just tell them, “Oh you’ll be fine.” Because when they aren’t, you will wonder what you could have done to help. Sit with them however long you need to and tell them it will get better. Talk to them about their problems and tell them there is help. Be the help. Get them assistance. Remind them of all the things they will miss in life.

For help, call 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Cover Image Credit: Brittani Norman

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You Need To Love Yourself First Before Jumping Into Relationships

You can't expect others to meet your expectations when you can't even reach them yourselves.

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I do not mean to shame anyone. Loving yourself is a lot harder than you might think. It requires you to ignore past lies people have spread about you, to embrace every little flaw, and sometimes to even reevaluate the life you're living. The problem with not loving yourself and then jumping into relationships, whether romantic or not, is that if we do not love ourselves how can we expect others to know how to.

To an extent, friends and romantic partners can help us love ourselves more. They can bring out sides of our personality we never knew existed and open our eyes to a new perspective on life. But, in my opinion, I don't think they can plant the seed of love in us. They can help us water it and watch it grow, but they did not start it and it is not their job to stimulate it. We must learn to love ourselves apart from all the friends, family and significant others. If you cannot be happy with yourself when no one is around, then you have placed too much pressure on those close to you.

As a Christian woman, I believe that I am loved by God even in my darkest times. This notion, that even when I do not love myself, He loves me, has kept me going through all the good and the bad. Your friends, your boyfriends and girlfriends, and even your family members are only human. They go through the same struggle of loving themselves and figuring out their own life. To place your security on them is selfish and as I've learned it will crumble in time. They are only human and the weight of your insecurity is too heavy to hold forever. I believe that there is only one being that can support me forever and that is God. If you aren't religious like I am though, we can apply it to ourselves (and I do sometimes as well). We must tell ourselves that we are loved and willing to be loved by others.

A lot of us were taught how to love others from a very small age. The quintessential 'golden rule' rings in my head: "treat others the way you want to be treated". So what happens when we don't treat ourselves in a nice way? We wonder why we sometimes we can't find it in our hearts to treat others justly - it is because we don't do ourselves justice. We fill our heads with self-demeaning and destructive thoughts and then wonder why we can't even look at ourselves in the mirror. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you've made. Stop telling yourself that you aren't good enough, or thin enough, or pretty enough. You just need to believe that you are and not let the world's lies affect you. I'm not saying it's going to be easy. I still struggle with loving myself through it all. But when you truly love yourself, apart from everyone around you, you will be unstoppable and then others will see how to love you too.

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